Is there any hope for me or should I give up on love?

This is year 33 of being single. Many to most girls hate me even though I try to be nice to them. I have been treated really badly. What should I do? Please don't say be patient as I have been extreemly patient and am still being extreemly patient and please don't say I will find someone one day because the truth is some people die alone. Please no mean comments, I am looking for helpful advice.

@Paris13 please help.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hi, @AppleFan1 One of my Bestie friends on here as far as amazing nic eguys go, thank you so much for asking for my opinion, always glad to help.
    As wise as I am, sweetie, I feel tha the Perfect Girl for you, will One day come in a Perfect Package that will be Just Perfect for you in every shape and form and way and you will live happily ever after some day.
    I believe sometimes that you feel there is a"Hate" Club of beauties out there who give you the finger, let's put it like this, but in telling you this, on all sides of Respect, I also know that in our own society today, You have to handle Them with kid's gloves in away where things go off without a hitch and you do not feel.. Ditched... This includes Girls who feel this way with guys who treat them in this way as well.
    Good luck and never give up... You are still young, my friend, and life has just begun, you have not found the right one as of yet. xxoo

    • Thanks Paris, yes this is exactly how I feel there is a "hate club of women" who just give me the finger.

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    • Your welcome.

    • :)) xxoo

Most Helpful Guy

  • These are some things I've observed so far:
    The best way to un-single yourself is a mix of self-improvement, patience, and exposure.

    Self Improvement.
    Slightly contradictory to what I just kind of said, patience is not something you particularly want. I feel that most people who "die alone" end up like that due to too much patience and often a strong inclination to shyness, maybe social awkwardness or something of that sort. Sometimes it simply they haven't met anyone, but I feel it usually has to do with too much waiting. Very honestly, it isn't your looks that are killing you.
    Societal pressures make the guy tend to push guys into making the first move. Very few girls will make the first move, especially since they may make the assumption that you are already taken or something since you are indeed 33. Try to approach more girls.
    If you feel the problems in this video (shyness or whatever like me)...

    Check out this. It is a useful article on talking to girls:

    When I say patience, I don't mean waiting for a girl to come along and make the first move. I mean taking rejection and moving on. Be patient after it. Rejection is hard and stuff, but it shouldn't be something to be afraid of.
    Patience also goes with the girls hating you. There are going to be many girls that are either rude, hate you, whatever. You just got to pick yourself up and move on. You only need one good one to make the rest of the bad ones go away :)

    I don't know your lifestyle exactly, but it is important to meet girls so you can actually have even the chance of un-singling yourself.
    Stereotypical places are things like bars, where people gather and it is easy (well.. easier) to start up conversations.
    HOWEVER, with the wonders of modern technology, online dating also works. It is not bad to do online dating. It is a worthwhile use of time to see what can happen. I can guarantee you are not in the same boat. I'm sure there are early-30 women looking for a man. Sure of it.

    One of the worst things you can do to yourself is say "I'm going to die alone." Once you get in that mentality, things will start to go downhill. You'll lose motivation to even try. If you don't try you can't succeed. It also makes you look less confident, and people love confidence (or rather, people dislike lack of confidence).

    Good luck! You CAN do it! You will NOT die alone.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 5

  • Giving up on love is probably the worst thing anyone could do.

    Have you tried using dating sites? I mean good ones. Not tinder or ok cupid or something. There are dating sites for people looking for serious relationships, so if you haven't tried these yet, I'd start there. You might have to pay for some of them, but if it helps you find a woman, then I'm sure it would be worth it.

    If that's not your thing, think about your interests, and maybe join a local group or club. A lot of people go to bars and clubs to meet women, but I feel like you'll meet more people that way who are bad for you than are good. Join a book club or hiking club or get involved with volunteer work. There are probably social clubs too, if you don't have any specific interests. If you are involved in something you care about, and are bettering yourself through your involvenent, you will be a lot more attractive to others. Join something that you'd enjoy even if there were no women there at all. I made most of my really good friends through a historic reenactment group, and its been so good for my overall happiness.

    • I tried dating sites and they were useless. I always found bars and clubs to be a bad place. I currently volunteer at the Zoo.

  • It’s not that you haven’t found the right girl, you just haven’t found the right girl for you. As the myth of Aristophanes goes, us humans are incomplete, so that is why we desire the company of other human beings and we are permanently looking for our other half, with the desire to be whole again. So don’t stop searching, I am sure you will find the half that you are looking for, maybe even coincidental. If you find it hard to look for her nearby, then widen your horizons, try online dating for example. Good luck in your quest. :D

  • Meh, we often attract the very thing we fear, so are you afraid you won’t find anyone, so you come across as uninterested, inhibited, checked out or disconnected to your heart or sexual energy?

    What if you embraced and leaned in to the fear, looked it in the eye, breathed and didn’t hide, retreat or even try to overpower it, just allow it? Then things can change.

    Good luck.

  • Well...

    Why do you think you this is?

    What are the roots of this.. hate.. and bad treatment?

    • Because I am ugly pretty much. That is the reason why I feel most girls have rejected me. No one believes me when I say this though.

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    • Yeah, you really should try and join some sort of club or activity group.

      Be that like, a bowling league.. or a pottery class.. or even a hiking group.

      Even if you only meet and connect with guys.. it gets you out of the house.. feeling good about yourself.. and.. you can meet people, through people...

    • I have done hiking before. Yeah thank you maybe I should take hiking up again.

  • Don't give up buddy! :D :) <3


What Guys Said 4

  • It is impossible to say why things happen badly in your relationships without knowing what happens in your relationships. Can you tell us about yourself, the kind of women who you want to date, how often you date, what happens on dates, how long do you date women, what are the reasons for the breakups?

  • I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm going to be blunt because I don't like to sugarcoat things that people want to improve on and I think you need to hear it. Your looks are preventing you from being in a relationship because you make it the reason why you're single. It shows very little confidence in yourself. You seem like a really good guy who deserves everything you want in life and I hope you do. But if this is the area of your life you'd like to get a handle on, then message me. I have something that will change your outlook on life, if you're open minded. I can't message others currently.

  • You claim the root cause of failure with women is your looks. Get real, I've seen your pic. Truth is you're not learning what you are doing wrong and taking corrective action.

  • My friend, just please do yourself a favour. If you are serious about changing: Get just these two... three books: Neill Strauss: the game. It's a brilliant story about how one man who struggled till he was 30, changed his life o become the worlds greatest pick up artist. He battled with looks too. Then get his follow up, "New rules of the game". It gives you great advice and an action plan to get women and most of it is building yourself worth. Then, the mot hard hitting book that killed me reading it: "No more mr nice guy" by Robert glover. That book explains why many men are struggling with women and having a mediocre life in general. Seriously good books, and I've read loads.