Why can't I seem to let go of something my girlfriend did in our relationship a few months ago?

There are days I am perfectly fine. Then then there are days where I just think about what she did with this guy was my friend. Her and I have talked about it many times. And I said I forgive her because I know my track record is not that good either. I forgive her because I love her and I want to make this work is just for some reason I can't let go of what she did back in January hanging out with this guy I like and she was. Ended up beating up the guy who was supposedly just friends with her. She said she was upset with me because I couldn't pay rent on time that month and I don't have my financial issues worked up. So she hung out with this guy and stayed over at his house excetera excetera. Then her and I start fixing again after I beat him up then couple weeks went by her and I fix a little more and more. And we talked about it numerous times it's just for some reason I can't get out of my head like I feel really betrayed. I just felt like that act was like a super unfaithful active hers. She told me details about what they did like the cuddle and watch movies together blah blah blah. I just feel like she's just still not being honest with me I got it I feel like there's just more that happened. And I feel like because I feel like there's something that happened like I can't let it go. I told her like you know what if you could just let me know that you guys f***** or whatever the case is then I can just move past this and accept it and we can just move past it. She keeps on denying it so I don't know I just I just can't move past it. She says that all they did was cuddle and I'm thinking in my head I'm like cuddling obviously leads to f****** how does how does cuddling not going anywhere from that. That's why it's just hard for me to accept you know. Anyway if I could get some advice on this week that'd be awesome yes I've been on and off stressing about it for a few months now I'm not sure if I should just break up with her and just leave it at that or if I


Most Helpful Girl

  • That sounds like a seriously tough situation. It's not like you can just keep turning it back on her after you've said you forgive her but then again it's obviously on your mind. You sound like you really like this girl and you're both old enough to make your own decisions. You have a right to feel betrayed that she ditched you for a guy friend of yours because you couldn't pay rent (or at least that's what im getting from this). I know that youve probably done this already or that someone else most likely going to say the same thing but you honestly need to sit down with her and tell her to be quiet and you tell her exactly how you've been taking it and give her the cold hard truth. What she did was absolutely wrong and unfaithful in my opinion but I don't have the full story so my honest advice is to make your peace by telling her everything that you've been feeling and how its been on your mind non stop. Talk to your friends for advice. Worst comes to worst and it doesn't seem to be getting better for you and it's causing you both misery then break it off. Cigarettes seem amazing when you smoke them but they kill you from the inside out. Not saying that she's not a nice girl but maybe sort your shit out first and get her to do the same before you get back into the relationship.

    • Thank you so much, i just needed someone elses thoughts on it. I am not planning on leaving her. I just feel like though for aome reason I cannot be 100% there for her though. If i end up getting upset, jealous, mad , sad about it. I feel like I got so betrayed and its so hard to explain. Like its hard to move forward when and be there for her if she's done that. I don't know i just feel lost.

    • She left you because you had financial difficulties and she 'cuddled' with another guy. I understand that it must be incredibly painful for you to deal with this but think about what will happen in the long run if it continues. It was incredibly childish of her to do it. if you love her then I expect you plan to marry her and "for better or for worse" you are supposed to stick by each other. I honestly think that she gave you a glimpse of what she's really like in tough situations and it's your opportunity to let her go and find an amazing woman who will stick by you no matter what. As a woman interpereting your gf's actions I'd say she's not as into this as you think. :) I hope you make the right decisions. You're young and there are so many women that you would do well with. She is probably not the right one. She may speak loving words to you but actions speak louder than words and she showed that.

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What Girls Said 1

  • She did this to you, based off of not having enough money to pay a bill. Partners are suppose to support their person when they are having difficulties. If the first thing she does it run off with a man on something so small... That's heart breaking. She needs to be left. There is no excuse for being in a relationship with someone that childish.

    • Yeah. Its just hard to leave her. I must be a fool to stay. I don't know i just love her a lot and its hard to let go. I just want to forget and move on. Its just somedays sitting next to her i get randomly jealous or upset in my mind and don't feel right the rest of the day and night.

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