Did I screw things up with this girl and came across as needy?

So, we have been on three dates so far:

(Last Week Wednesday)

Hey, you wanna do something tomorrow? I'm kinda free

10/9, 12:03am
im really busy the whole weekend

next week if I am not going to Korea

10/9, 12:06am


10/12, 8:16pm
Korea cancelled, surprise (not)

10/12, 8:47pm
Me: I was hoping you would get it.. Keep persisting


10/14, 11:53pm
Me: Hey, you wanna watch a movie tomorrow night


10/15, 11:28am
Her:Today im busy, maybe tomorrow

10/15, 1:07pm
Me: Tomorrow I can't. I have other plans. Maybe another time then

10/15, 1:07pm
Her: Sure

10/15, 2:47pm
Me: So, I'm going to NYC tomorrow and will probably be back by 7 pm. We can still go for a show after 7

10/15, 8:42pm
Her: Let me check first at what time ill meet my friend tomorrow, ill let you know

(Date day 4:43 PM and she still didn't respond)


10/16, 4:43pm
Me: It's ok... Go ahead and meet your friend

10/16, 7:04pm
Me: How about tomorrow night?

10/16, 7:51pm
Me: You know what... Forget about it

(Now the Disaster)
10/16, 8:18pm
Me: Hi

Ops, by mistake

10/16, 8:23pm
Her: Is something wrong?

10/16, 8:24pm
Me: No... That Hi was to my brother

Anyway, enjoy the weekend

I was thinking we could meet tomorrow instead, but I'm sure you are busy.. So, I decided to go back to NYC tomorrow

10/16, 8:31pm
Her: Sure, enjoy

10/16, 8:51pm
Me: Mary, next time you don't want to meet just tell me upfront.. You don't have to string me along

10/16, 8:54pm
Her: What is wrong with you?

My friend just left like half an hour ago, there are some things you cannot plan


10/16, 11:55pm
Me I came all the way back from NYC thinking we could meet.. My mistake, I should have asked first... Anyway, good night

10/17, 12:04am
Her: Sorry, didn't know

Have a good night

I havn't contacted since then. So, what do you think guys. What should I do to fix the situation?

It turns out she is seriously interested. She was just really with her friend visiting from another town :)

Also, my reaction maybe needy but it encouraged her to become more open about our status and where we are heading. I think the outcome was better than I would have ever expected


Most Helpful Girl

  • It seems as if she is not wanting to hang out and as if she's trying to find excuses each time. So if I were you I would ask her if she's even interested and I'm sure she will answer honestly and ask her why she doesn't wanna hang out because I don't think she's been busy each time

    • This is what I thought last weekend, but then, why would she tell me her Korea trip was cancelled. For me it seemed like she was hinting to ask her out again. Also, on Friday, she could just say she is meeting her friend and shut me down, instead she gave me a maybe. This is what confuses me!!

    • I would be extremely confused also. When u think the time is appropriate I would call her and ask her out and ask her when she's free because I feel like on the phone it will be better

Most Helpful Guy

  • You're definitely coming across as needy. The best thing you can do is give her a few days to herself, then call or text her with, "I want to take you out for [whatever you plan to do]. When are you free?" If she gives you a specific day, you're in; choose a time and pick her up then. If she doesn't give you a day, tell her something like, "Why don't you call or text me when you figure out your schedule?" Then wait to hear from her.

    • In the last two times, I would ask her out, and she would shut me down. Then, few days later, she contacts me back to meet. So, I think my best shot is to wait for few days and see if she contacts me back. I'm not going to contact her until a week at least has passed!!

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What Girls Said 1

  • you probably did mess it up


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