How to get my boyfriend to be more affectionate?

*Sorry this is long* Okay, so in the beginning of our relationship, my boyfriend and I were head over heels for each other. He would always compliment me and tell me how beautiful I was, he would take me on nice dates, and he would call me through out the day to check up on me. We've been dating for over a year now and all of that has cone to a stop really. He doesn't send me cute little texts anymore, he hasn't bought me flowers since our first 3 months of dating, he called me beautiful for the first time in months the other day, and he doesn't take me out on dates really anymore. My boyfriend doesn't drive, so I'm the one usually taking us out. He also goes through his money like toilet paper and I've told him over and over how he needs to start saving and he never listens to me. So when he goes through his money, he always comes to me for what he wants or needs. Don't get me wrong, it's not always about materialistic things, because I'm not a snobby person at all, it's just sometimes I wish he would stop relying on me and start saving up. I know he has bills, but he still has money left over that he spends on cigarettes and other stuff. He also doesn't really like me cuddling on him too much or kissing him too much. Whenever I try and relax and lay on him, like his stomach or chest, he always has an excuse of why he doesn't want me laying on him and when he does let me lay on him he always wants a rub or something I return. I can never just relax and lay down and enjoy his company. I love my boyfriend and I know he cares for me and loves me too, I just wish he would show it more and take the initiative to show me how much he cares and loves me, because he doesn't really show it at all. Any advice?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Well, in reality, HE has to realize that there is a problem, and once he is aware of it, HE has to seek advice on how to fix it. But it feels like he just isn't invested at all and complacent in a bad way...

    If there's one thing though, I would try to restrict the amount of help I give him. He is so comfortable asking you for money because you are always available for providing. If you say you don't have any to spare, he might become a bit more responsible. Maybe find him a budgeting app to use.

  • Gpd i loved the head over heels part... i miss it... I can't believe how can someone stop their girl from hugging them... If my girl did that... I would have given her tighter hugs in exchange :). I would just never let her go... Ur boyfriend sounds kinda like my girlfriend... A little cold from the outside... We both know they love us but they have serious problem showing it... What is the problem with people these days... Why are people so selfish... I really feel bad for u... Im feeling same... Honestly i was going to suggest u to go and hug him tightly and tell him all this but perhaps I need to think something better. U can try wiring a cutsy little note or a letter saying these in the loveliest possible way... What u really need to do is make him realize... U can also try to not talk to him to get his attention and calm him down to a nice warm talk... I hope u find something useful from hete


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