Did I overreact?

So a friend that I have been 'hanging out' with bailed on me last minute on Friday. He said a friend needed him, but would try to see if he could reschedule..He didn't text me till an hour later asking if we could just hang out later that night. I told him to take care of his business; I figured it must be important.

He then texted me the next day asking if I wanted to go, but I told him I wasn't feeling up to it.

I wasn't upset like he thought I'd be, just hurt. This isn't the first time he's done this and I have a good feeling it was his pregnant ex that was wanting him.

I don't know if it's just me, but when I make plans with someone and then someone else wants to hang out I tell them "sorry but I've already got plans, maybe some other time."

I feel like I may have overreacted, maybe I should have just said it was okay and went with him anyways...

what do you think?


Most Helpful Girl

  • okay so the guy scheduled plans with u, then bailed on you for someone else.

    he said he'd see if he could reschedule (at HIS convenience or YOURS?)

    then he txted you an hour later asking if you could hang out later...

    then texted you the next day

    sounds like this boy is thinking about what's most convienient for him and not really thinking about ur time. he's done it before to make matters worse. so basically its like ur time isn't as valuable as his and he's seeing you as an option and not really a priority to hang with.

    he makes plans with you but then gets a better offer and is like "Oh I'll hang out with Limelife whenever, she ain't going no where, she has nothing else to do" then calls you when he's done doing what he wants to make it up to u. since he's done it before and you seemed cool with it, why not do it again? after all you have nothing better to do then hang with me anyway. now I don't know ur schedule so that may not even be true...but its the impression ur giving off and how he's treating u.

    why do you feel that being upset about it is "overreacting"? I would be worried if you didn't notice there was a problem with that. why should you ignore the fact he is inconviencing you like that? people treat you how you let them. you don't have to bend overbackwards to be available for a guy who seems not to respect ur time or think hanging with you is that important. some of these girls act like there are only 3 guys left on the face of the earth and we better be right at their beck and call else they won't want us! omg!

    • Well it's at his convenience, it always seems to be at his convenience..

      I know were just friends, but sometimes I feel like he's wanting more...

      Now I just feel like I'm being used, because every time I plan something something comes up..but when he plans something I always show up...

      If I have plans it's always first come first serve in my opinion unless someone is dying or something..I don't know..I'm not really upset but it's making me rethink what I really am to him.

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  • yes, you are.

    1) pregnant ex takes precedence. it's his child and he is doing the right thing by manning up

    2) you're friends. not anything more, right?

    3) he offered to reschedule for later AND the next day. he clearly feels bad and wants to hang out. so what's your problem? people lead busy lives, sometimes things come up and they have to cancel plans. he still wanted to hang out so obviously he wasn't blowing you off.

    • I know people have busy lives and such, but he's cancelled plenty of times and in the past I've always been pretty cool with it, but now I'm starting to feel more like a doormat..

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    • Well, if it's a constant thing, and you feel like it's always gotta be convenient for him and he's not putting any effort into this friendship, then perhaps let him know that and just stop putting in the effort yourself. If he decides he values your friendship, it'll be up to him to put some effort into it. If he's always putting you on the backburner, simply to have someone to hang out when there isn't anything else to do, then he's not worth it as a friend.

    • I guess your right, I guess I won't put in so much effort and see how things go.

  • you didn't overreact I would be a little ticked off too/

  • if you like this guy cut him some slack. the important thing is is that he wasn't really bailing on you because he made an effort to reschedule. this shws that he cares and likes you. bowing him off will onnly end things before they even begin.

    • But I just couldn't go, it wouldn't have been the same...

      I did apoligized though

      even though he's bailed on me many times before...