Should I be worried my boyfriend never wants to have sex?

We have been dating almost a year, and at first we had sex maybe a couple times a week, but now I'm lucky if we do it once a week. He tells me it's because sex is a chore for him because he's out of shape, and I don't like being on top. He says he feels unattractive getting winded and sore from just having sex and that turns him off. I tried to tell him I find him sexy no matter what, but it seems the only time I can talk him into sex is if I ask early in the evening and if I'm wearing lingerie and surprise him. But I feel like our relationship is new enough that I shouldn't have to convince him to have sex with me, he should be jumping at the chance. I've also suggested we try different positions to try to take some of the strain off of him but he didn't seem very keen on it anyway. I'm pretty confident he loves me. We fall asleep cuddling or touching every night, he says he loves me and I'm beautiful or sexy like every day and is always touching me in some way so I know the problem isn't that he doesn't care, but I just feel like shit because he never wants to have sex. Any thoughts?


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  • If he says he's out of shape then why don't you suggest working out together or something. If he's in better shape he won't find it as much of a chore.

    • Yeah I should do that. I mean I've been cookin pretty healthy and we've talked about a gym membership together before.

    • I figure if that's his excuse for not wanting sex then why not spend time together working towards his goal and maybe tell him when he feels up to it you would be happy if the two of you had sex, but only when he feels better about doing it.

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