I can't stop thinking about how my ex damaged my heart soul and future.. why can't I stop?

So it's been 2yrs since I been with my ex. He and I had been seeing each other for 7 months. I'll start with when I found a ball of hair in his bathroom garbage. ( he blamed it on his mom) . I would spend the night and come back a few days later and my things would always be moved! Found two wine cups in the sink and he was always so secretive with his phone. There was a time he got into some trouble so I had to sell his apartment n he asked to stay with me. It was never a lack of finance by far he had the most money anybody I had been with had! We went on a trip the Miami and At this time we were staying together at my place. When we got back from our trip we found out we were pregnant. A month went by and he started acting worse. Not spending anytime with me. Just out alday and slept at mine. Very secretive with the phone. I got tired of him not being there and when he was he was on the phone so I kickt him out and he decided to take a trip to Miami with his boy. I figured that trip and space apart was good enough, plus I'm pregnant so let's just work it out. He came back and when he was sleeping I went in his phone. OH MY GOD. What I found was horrific. He was talking to so many women. Asking for pics calling them babe meeting for dinner his boys and him would be talking about meeting different girls and fucking them. He was even talking to two girls offering to pay for a hotel for them. Here comes the BOMB!!! So that trip he took to Miami with his boy he had pics in the phone of him and another women in the bed missing so he def cheated on me out there knowing I was pregnant. Smh! Man I was heart broken. I wanted a family and this baby so bad. I was depressed and so hopeless. I ended up losing my baby from it all. I remember even after that I kind of tried to make us work. But still he was being unfaithful. I don't know why God put me through that pain cus it scared me for life. I think about it still three years later , y can't I get over it?


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  • Yeah I got damaged too, it will just take me a very long time to trust a girl again.


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