Is it true looks don't matter?

A lot of men's dating advice and PUA literature seems to point towards the perspective that high self-esteem and confidence are more attractive traits to most women than outer appearance.

e. g. in this video, Owen Cook (from Real Social Dynamics) who is short, balding, ginger and over 40 shows the difference in the receptivity from random women he approaches in the street when he has a pessimistic/self-deprecating attitude, compared to when he is full of optimism and positivity. when he approaches confidently with a natural energy level, he is able to get random make outs on the street, and ends up taking two girls home with him. this is in spite of his absentee good looks (although he has a nice smile and attractive facial features).

of course, there is the possibility that this is all staged, but I would be interested to hear from GaG.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Look do matter... I am not going to want to date you if I don't find something about you attractive.

    • ok, thank you for your honesty!

    • Show All
    • but like I said, don't take it too seriously

Most Helpful Guy

  • Looks obviously do matter, but there's no point in worrying about them if you don't have them or are incapable of having them.

    For example, the Zulu in the Anglo-Zulu War most certainly realized that the would be better off is they had repeating rifles and machine guns; but they didn't have access to those, and they had no efficient way of getting them, so they turned to what they had: spears, maces, bows, and sword-like weapons. But, utilizing their other advantages, the managed to still strike a victory against the British in the Battle of Isandlwana of 1879, slaughtering over 1,300 British soldiers.

    The point is that even if something like looks do matter, you can still strike a decisive victory through other means.


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Looks matter... I don't wanna wake up to ugliness


What Guys Said 3

  • looks matter, hate to break it you, focus on getting in shape, most people can become better looking if they get in shape. Height, somewhat but not all the time

  • PUAs are omly intrested in bedding as many as possible.

    • this is true, but I don't think there is much wrong with that as long as safety / precautions are taken (e. g. contraception is used and the woman is not likely to harm them for any reason).

    • Identifying and choosing the right targets seems to do it for those PUAs. I know a lot of women who aren't even interested in any PUA.

  • They always matter to get your foot in the door, everyone has to feel something or Its a No Go


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