Am I being selfish in disapproving of polygynous relationships?

That is a relationship in which the guy has multiple girls who are committed to him.

I dislike the idea, but am I just being selfish in objecting to it? (Obviously this type of thing means rich/tall/strong/good looking guys have multiple girls while most men would go without.) If the girls are happy the only being 'hurt' by this are less appealing guys, which is pretty entitled of us to be bothered by it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, it's their relationship so it's really none of anyone else's business. If it's consensual and everyone involved is happy with it then there's nothing wrong there.

    I disagree with the idea that 'less appealing guys' will be hurt by it. Your assumption seems to be that the girls would 'settle' for someone they weren't attracted to if the guys they wanted were taken and not open to polygyny. I don't think they'd choose to be with someone they weren't attracted to regardless, if they couldn't be with someone they found 'appealing' they would just stay single. So it wouldn't make a difference to 'less appealing' guys

    • When I say less appealing I mean less appealing than the super hot guys, I don't mean completely unappealing. I'm just talking about your average guy.

    • Okay, but everyone isn't polygynous; only some people are, so there would still be girls who preferred monogamy. And in my opinion the 'settling' thing still stands, to be with a guy I have to find him hot. And tbh that's largely to do with him as a person. Him being rich doesn't matter to me, strong not really 'cause my preference is for skinny guys, as long as he's taller than me (I'm 5'4) and under like 6'2 then that's a good height in my opinion, and while looks do matter it's kind of a yes or no deal compared with all the considerations to do with his personality. Like okay some guys are super good looking, but I will find a more 'average' guy more good looking depending on how much I like him and connect with him. Also people are attracted to different things, so the 'super hot' guys won't all be guys who fill certain criteria, there'll be different groups. I genuinely don't think there'd be that much difference.

    • Even if I otherwise found a guy really attractive, for example, him being polygynous would be a deal breaker because I'm monogamous.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, you are. People always are worried about other people and it sickens me. Care about yourself and only yourself. I can date as many girls as I want at a time, how is that going to effect you?

    • You're sounding a bit contradictory here... you're acknowledging that my disapproval is selfish, then saying how sickening worrying about others is and to care only about myself - which is what being selfish, and what you at first said I was being.

      "... how is that going to effect you?"

      If the top 10% of men (the tall/rich/hot men) have five or ten wives each then the vast majority of guys aren't going to be able to find a wife/girlfriend at all.

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    • You are saying it like all the women in the world are going to be taken, that is a large exaggeration.

    • They would be if most men had two wives, which I why I just pointed out two you that it wouldn't possible for most men to do this.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Just be happy for people who do what makes them happy

    • How does that make them happy when most people are taught how something so sexist is fair for them? Girls are taught to 'bow down' to men, let them control the things, be whatever he wants you to be, let him have many girlfriend while you're his slave. How does that make them happy. In the inside I guarantee that girl is jealous with low self esteem because the person thats supposed to be her man, her true love is pleasing another woman. Thats cheating by the way

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    • Smfh lol. Wow. I can't believe women like you actually exist. Do Canadians (women) not have rights or something:/

    • It's a personal choice

  • Hell no. you're awesome for being so fair. The world needs more guys like you

    • I just feel that my objection is basically chauvinistic - I'm thinking about the guys who would be left single, when what should matter is are those in the relationship happy with it.

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    • Well some of them claim to be; I guess it's conceivable that a girl might rather share a really good looking successful guy rather than settle for a mediocre guy.

    • I'll date any guy that respects me. I'm be a fool to let my bf/husband date other women

What Guys Said 0

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