I can't tell if we are starting to drift apart or if he really is just busy. Help?

I've been dating this guy come a year in January. I am in my mid 20's and he is in his late 20's. He has an 6 year old child. The mother of his kid is in a relationship and has kids with someone else. He and I are both in college. We used to text/talk/see each other almost every single day and about a month or 2 ago, things have started to get dry. I'm usually always the one initiating conversations that lead to dead ends. He tells me he cares about and misses me but lately it seems as though he doesn't take any initiative to reach out to me. I understand that he is busy (as am I) with school, work and his child but it doesn't take much to respond to a text or at least call me once in a while. Lately, we are starting to go days if not weeks without talking. Sometimes I'll text him something and he'll respond instantly, but once again, it doesn't go anywhere and sometimes he won't respond at all. I really care about him and I want this to turn into something great. Do you think that I'm overreacting and he genuinely is busy since finals/term papers are upon us or he is losing interest in me? I'm trying my best to be patient, focus on my assignments and not be too "needy" and just give him space- I know he has more to tend to on his plate being that he is not only a student but a father as well. Do you think he will start to come around again once the semester ends/break begins?


Most Helpful Girl

  • You have to determine if you are getting your needs fulfilled in that relationship or if you aren't. You can't make him change his behaviour, and waiting around hoping he starts to change doesn't do any good either. You can express to him how you are interpreting his behaviour i. e. when he doesn't respond you feel like you aren't a priority to him, and see what his response is. But you might just have to accept it's not the kind of relationship you want.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Dating a guy for a year and sometimes go weeks without talking?

    You're drifting apart... and it sounds like it's not you. It's him.


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