This is really weird and it might end my relationship therefore I need your help really bad?

Long story short so that I don't bore you, my boyfriend of 1 yr had all of his email passwords banks password under his ex's name. Ok... He changed them so my name which it was stupid but whatever, he kept an email he had with his name and her bday digits, so I asked why. We got into a fight so he changed the email to his name, and for some reason that bothered me and hurt my feelings. Because I am Not looking at the emails I am looking at what's behind it. The meaning of it. He thought of her and him when he created that. And now he changes it to him. Like I didn't expect for him to put anything adding us but somehow this hurt my feelings. I don't know if this is stupid or not but I want your honesty since this is why we are here. I'm looking at the thought behind it. Not "hung up on an email" please give me an advice


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is a total non issue. You are putting way more thought into his email account password than he did. It sounds like you are looking for a reason to start a fight. If you like him, then stop pushing him away, by over thinking every little detail. That is coming across as really controlling. To him, they were no longer his ex's bday digits. It was just an email address that he didn't want to bother changing.

    You are demanding too much, and not even letting him know what you expect from you. You even got your way, and are still upset. After all he changed it, which is what you wanted. So why does that still hurt you? Is it because it isn't your bday he is now using? You taught him it was a mistake to use his girlfriends bday so it only makes sense he wouldn't use it again. I am more worried that he sounds overly clingy for adding your name on his stuff after only dating for one year.

    • Đ½ate to agree but you make a point. His mistake for putting someone else's only back fired on him with me. I got tired of seeing her pics laying around his room, well his parents house now Cus he moved in with me, but sex videos, stupid cards everywhere and I've been the one cleaning up his past by telling him to get rid of all that stuff. I mean if I had no idea of this I wouldn't of bothered. But it was in my face for quite some time now, so this small issues is what broke the camels back

    • I can see where you could be offended by him keeping sex videos of her and such. If that is the case then just talk to him about that stuff, in a way that doesn't come across as pushy, or like you are accusing him of anything. Let him know you aren't accusing him of stuff, but that it makes you feel insecure for him to have that stuff around. Then let him know you would appreciate if he got rid of that stuff.

      I have also left photos of an ex around for a while, simply because she meant so little to me, it wasn't important enough to me to throw them away. So that alone doesn't concern me. I can totally understand how a new girlfriend would find such things offensive though. I would think he could respect why that would bother you. Hopefully the two of you can work on your communication before making such a big deal out of something that is most likely a small matter. Guys aren't taught how to be great boyfriends. We just stumble along, learning as we go.

Most Helpful Girl

  • sorry you feel this way... prehaps my story can make you feel better. my boyfriend of 14 months. told me so much aobu this ex. girlfriend. it is making me feel very insecure.
    he also has stuff from his ex. wife (who he cheated on to be with that ex. girlfriend.) yet still has lots lots of ex. wifes stuff. so can you explain that?

    some men don't like to throw out stuff, it was part of their past.
    you are with him now (i try to tell myself that as well)
    but i understand you. its hard


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What Guys Said 4

  • How does he treat you? Do you have any reason to not trust him? If you introduce him to your parents, would you be afraid of how he might act or proud to call him your boyfriend? Do you have your eye on the big picture?

  • How's the rest of the relationship?
    I wouldn't make assumptions based on an email password or a date... It may mean something, or nothing at all. How come this worries you so much? What else is going on?

  • He likely just forgot about the email. I have folders I haven't even checked in a year or longer. Or if he did remember it he might keep it as a reminder of how far he's come since then. Have his actions and feelings towards you changed in any way? Is the relationship that new that it should end over an old email? Do you want it too?

    • No. It hasn't. But my point is that, when he made that email he was thinking about her, and when I gave him a piece of my mind be change it to a regular email with his name. So it made me
      Think was she more special, it just really hurt my feelings

  • Nope I wouldn't be upset


What Girls Said 1

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