What does this Mean?

I asked her if her ex came back into her life would her return for him she said she does not know but that she only wants me I asked her again she said even if her feelings return for her ex she likes me more so I broke up with her after she told me this am I right can I get any reason why I am
confused and hurt


Most Helpful Guy

  • She should have broken up with you based entirely on your lack of punctuation.

    Readers on G@G shouldn't have to be black-belt-puzzle solvers in order to decipher your questions. So take a breath and 3 extra seconds to add commas, capitalization, and periods next time?

    The problem with your relationship was that you were needy and insecure. It's ridiculous to expect other people to stop having feelings for their ex's just because they're now with you. That kind of thinking screams "I'm insecure!!! PLEASE LOVE ME MORE!!" So I think you're doing her a favour by letting her go.

    Just like getting married doesn't make all men suddenly gay... we will always find other women attractive. That's not a choice, it's just nature. The only time it's problem is when we become focused on someone that we're not dating because it's unfair to our partner. And that is not what your girlfriend was saying at all. Having feelings for someone is completely different than being obsessed with someone. Feelings aren't a choice. Sitting around thinking about someone IS a choice.

    And you should really be looking at yourself, asking yourself "why do I care if she has feelings for her ex?" Because all that really matters is how she behaves and how she treats you. If she's being open and honest to your ridiculous questions then she sounds like a pretty good partner.

    Now get your head straight. Focus on what you're insecure about and work to resolve your inner conflicts. That's called growing up, and it'll make you more attractive man.

    ~ Robby

    • Sometimes intuition is misinterpreted as insecurity. His inquiry doesn't necessarily means he's insecure or have unrealistic expectations.

      "I asked her if her ex came back in her life, would she return to him? She said, I do not know." That, by itself, suggests she has strong residual feelings for her ex. And, to her, at least, the possibility of reconciling with him is, if he returns for her soon, significant. And thus shouldn't be ignored by Anonymous. The purpose of her last answer to his last question may have been simply to amend her previous answer.

      As, in some cases, people are blindsided by breakups. So there is some legitimacy to his feelings.

    • @Teddius Good point!

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  • Dude, you can't ask women questions like that. They are emotional creatures who are crammed with feelings.

    Why are you hurt and confused? You asked her to read into a hypothetical situation with limited facts. Did she lie to you? No. You asked her if she would return to her ex. She said she doesn't know and that is true. If she's still with you, then she probably wasn't going anywhere. But if she was single would she return to her ex? She might.

    Then you asked her again and she basically told you that even if she still had feelings for her ex, she'd stay with you. If you're going to ask questions like that, you've got to be ready to handle the answers.

    You're hurt and confused because you thought you were the only one she ever cared for. But women care for all kinds of people. That's what they do. And it's hard to understand for some men because we often turn emotions on and off like a switch. But women, for them emotions are like the weather, it is just something that happens without a lot of control.