Is it wrong to turn down a guy without giving him a chance for being so patient to try to get to know a shy girl?

Sometimes I feel bad for being so superficial. I at first thought this guy just wanted to be friends since he didn't compliment or flirt with me.

Then later he tries to make a pass at me when I already determined him not my type based on looks so I decline his advances. And the guy feels like 'he wasted his time'.

Honestly I don't like the idea of a guy working hard to get to know me and Expecting his efforts to pay off I guess.
Should I next time just shut him down before he tries to get that far? I dont know how I'm leading these guys on but it always happens when I dont see it coming.


Most Helpful Girl

  • You being nice to him isn't "leading him on" or wasting his time.

    As long as you never made it clear you were interested and then said just kidding, its not your fault.

    He chose to try, that's on him. You're not required to want him. Just to be a decent person, which you were.

    • Lol ya I feel like being nice is but I can't help being who I am.
      You're right though, he chose to try. Thanks

    • I've gotten that too.
      Guys insisting that I should be interested because they tried, or that I lead them on by talking to them and enjoying them as a person.

      Like, uh.. You're a person, of course. I'll talk to you.
      Being kind is an obligation , being pressured isn't.

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What Girls Said 4

  • If you're not physically attracted you can't fake the relationship wouldn't last long

  • I hate guys like that. You don't owe him shit!!

  • No, serves him right for trying to prey on shy girls

  • Not wrong but next time don't let a guy get that close to you