Is he pushing me out? Why?

Alright, this is kind of a long story between me and a guy that I met last year. We're in a wind ensemble together and we met about a year and a half ago. When we first met, I thought this guy liked me, and I kind of wrote him off because I was into someone else in the group (even though, I do admit, he was adorable- kind of in a brother-y way, but nonetheless he was adorable). We were friends all of last year, and that was all. We were just two band geeks, two acquainted band geeks.
But this year... that changed.
It all started with, shameably, a haircut. He used to have a really floppy bowl cut, so when I saw how he had done something so dramatic and cool, I was almost dumbfounded. Naturally we began rekindling our friendship, and we added each other on Instagram. Then, when we met at an audition at a school where it was too loud to talk, we exchanged numbers so we could text instead. A few days later, he added me on Snapchat, and we've been going at it (somewhat erratically) since November.
That all changed when I accidentally gave him a note (not labeled with a name or anything, since I thought that my message was universal) that I had meant to give my friend specifically that added at the bottom, "ps- hang out in 2016?" Which caused the guy to think I was asking him out.
Ever since then, we've kept talking, but I've had to initiate all of the conversations. He's been seeming to deliberately talk to his friend (a girl, who I am inexplicably jealous of) rather than me at our rehearsals every week and I don't know what's happening.
Perhaps this all happened because of the note, or the fact that I always seem to text first, or something else entirely that I have absolutely no control over. But what I do know is this: I liked the version of this guy that I met at the beginning of the year. A LOT. I really don't like this version of him, and I don't know what happened, but I don't want to lose him, no matter what it is.
GAGers, what d


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What Guys Said 1

  • Did you clarify the situation by naming who the letter was intended for and, equally important, express disinterest in dating him the moment he appeared to misinterpret the situation?

    If not, I'm of the belief he's convinced that the dynamics of the friendship has changed, which could be positive... or negative. Thus, he feels awkward with you.

    Or, as you stated, it could be something else entirely.

    • I didn't specify that it was for someone else because I thought that it might be an opportunity to get to know him, despite him being the wrong recipient. In any case, I don't like how he's been treating talking to me kind of like a chore. thus I figure I'll make sure he knows that if he wants to talk to me, then HE will talk to ME, and I won't push. Because frankly I'm done with trying to make him think something of me.

    • I hear that!

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