What to do if you had no youth?

I grew up with a mother who was very distant and cold towards us, she wasn't emotionally attached to us. She was very anti-social and because of that i was anti social, in my teenage years 4,5 years went to the fact i was disabled psychally and the other half i was very depressed and just hated life, almost commited suicide at 20. Im 23 now and i never had any fun, no boyfriends, barely any friends (if i wanted ones my mother wouldn't leave me alone) she didn't moved us socially, im a very closed person and i feel very worthless most of the time. Im 23 almost 24 and all i do is work eat, go to school and sleep, i barely have fun friends. I know i will regret it so much when im older that all my energy was invested in my mother, she suffers from depression. I never knew love and worst thing of all im scared i will never meet him. Im struggeling wih finding a job and i still live at home. Im also scared i will catch up with time and have sex with many men and never have a relationship cause the thought of being with one person... i feel like i took my youth for granted. Help?


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  • You 23 girl not 40. Plenty of youth left in us.


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