Do I need to worry about my new boyfriends baby's mom?

So I met this guy online about 4 months ago. He's older and already has children which is okay because I do to. Everything seems to be going well and he's really sweet, we are officially together now. The other day I went through his phone and read all these messages between him and his daughter's mom. The daughter is only 4. It seemed like in the messages she was blowing him off but he kept asking her if she would like to go to dinner with him, if he could come over, and he was even inviting her over. From the text its apparent that she knows about me bc she kept saying like, "why are you asking me... go ask your new girlfriend." And he would reply. "oh baby please... there's still time for us". Then I realized through the text that she did in fact let him come over. She had a few drinks with him and they hung out. But it gets worse.. he asked her if she would stay the night. She said yes be there shortly. I assume she stayed the night because it was one of those nights when I know I didn't see him. He says that they've been broken up for years now, so why are they still texting each other. More importantly why did he cheat on me with her and if he's ready to move on then why does it seem like he's still chasing her. Is he using her, or is he using me? Will she always be something that I might have to worry about? He let me meet his daughter but he won't let me come when he picks and drops her off. I'm worried because I already have 4 kids which he is the father of none.. do you think that bothers him? Is he still in love with her? I saw him telling her that she was beautiful and she was say, "apparently not beautiful enough or you wouldn't be with that smut"... he would just reply.."Smh"


Most Helpful Girl

  • There's a lot of red flags here. He's leading a double life. He's cheating on you with her and seems to have no remorse about it.
    I think you should gather your four kids and move on.
    He's going to continue this behavior, because it's clear to see he's only looking to hide it and not come out with the truth.
    If guilt doesn't eat a person up, then they are heartless.
    Is that the type of man you want to be with?
    Someone who only cares about themselves?


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