She slept in my bed but we only cuddled?

This girl was a friend, then we became friends with benefits and after she said she doesn't want a relationship at that time we went back to friends but I'd completely fallen for her. There were lots of possible reasons why it ended but I think the main reason was I was too nice and too weak. She did however say that she likes me and the time might be right in the future. Her ex boyfriend came back into town and I believe she started speaking to him again.

Over the past few weeks she has gotten a bit closer to me, she claimed she misses me a lot one evening and started talking to me a lot more. We went out for my Birthday and she was asking me to get a Birthday kiss from another girl, which was a blow! I didn't because I was out to have fun with my friends. She stayed at mine in my bed and we cuddled up in our underwear and held hands but didn't have sex. I am much more confident and comfortable around her now but I feel that she may only see me as a friend now which hurts!

What do you guys think, would you share a single bed cuddled up to just a friend? There could have been many reasons she didn't want to have sex because I didn't want to really (drunk at 4am with my parents in the next room with a friend my parents have never met). But do you think it's worth making myself less available and maybe start flirting with her? I don't know if the attraction is completely gone.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Back off a bit.
    And yes I've slept in a bed with platonic male friends...

    • Thanks. I've decided it's the best idea. Make myself less available to her and see what happens. If nothing then I'm going to have to talk to her about our friendship

    • :) thats the best way to solve it as your too available for her to change her mind

Most Helpful Guy

  • i have shared a bed with a single female friend. it was, and it is what it sort of sounds like your situation is about, entirely about non-threatening physical intimacy. non-threatening in the sense that you know the person won't push for anything more, like no unwanted advances; however you get the intimacy of being close to another person. a lot of people, esp women, can really desire that non-threatening platonic relationship with a male that seems to sort of go a step towards romance without any actual romance

    • So what do you think is the best thing for me to do? I'm crazy about this girl! I know moving on is the best and easiest option but I've tried it a lot of times and can't escape, I see her quite a lot and every time I think I've moved on I see her again and she is sweet with me and my feelings rush back

    • i think you lay it out on the table. you tell her how you feel and what you want. and if she isn't down for the same thing you can basically tell her that you two can remain friends but some of those things that blur the lines a bit may have to stop so both of you can move on in terms of finding romantic matches

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 3

  • well, she said that she don't want the relationship. probably just having a fun. welcome aboard to friendzone pall.

  • #friendzoned, good luck, pal. I'd move on.

    • I think it's best but because we are the same friend circle it's very difficult. Who knows, we were friends and we had sex in the past, maybe if I man up a bit and be less affectionate she might realise what she's lost

    • That's exactly what I'd do.

  • A woman does not ever get into your bed in her underwear and not expect it to lead to sex. If she does then she's playing with you and trouble, and you don't want to be anywhere near her anyway. She probably wanted you to keep trying and the fact that you didn't probably killed some attraction.

    • It was after a night out so she was wearing a dress before. I gave her one of my t-shirts but she was just wearing underwear below. And she was happy to spoon

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