Why is he trying to sleep with me, but not date me?

hello, I am new to this site.

some guy from college was pursuing me last year. we "dated" for 3 weeks. he turned out to be a player. to make a long story short, he knew I was very naive in the whole dating scene, and he told me outrageous things like "i think you're amazing, and so hot". honestly, I'm an average looking girl with a good body. he resisted very much to not take me out on a real date. he wouldn't spend any money on me, apart from coming over to my place or driving me around to the beach so we could walk on it. even when I asked him to take me out, he resisted and eventually just left me. we never had sex (I am a virgin and he knows that). BEFORE me, he dated this beautiful, high maintenance girl who he literally spent a lot of money on. SHE dumped him 2 weeks later.

1. do you think he resisted spending money on me because he didn't think I was very attractive?

2. or do you think he resisted spending money on me because he got burned by the highly attractive girl who dumped him earlier?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Don't link his spending with his level of interest. For the most part I only spend money on a girl once we're "together" or if we're long time friends. Other wise dating becomes far too expensive.

    My answer to your question is this: He wasn't that into you. Therefore he likely decided that showing you too much interest would unfairly mislead you. Perhaps, like most guys, he was hoping you would be interested in no-strings-attached sex, but likely he discovered that wasn't your cup of tea.

    Better luck choosing the next guy. Make sure he's not a "player"... don't let your ego decide who's best.. use your head and heart.

    ~ Robby

    P.S. Men might first start dating you based on your looks (being cute is all it takes) but we fall in love with your personality. So make sure your insides are as polished and clean as your outsides.

    My blog ( link )

    • So you are saying that he wasn't that into me because of my personality, rather than my looks?

    • Ha! Don't make it sound so bad. He obviously thought you were cute enough to chat up and hang out with, but with time decided you weren't his type.

      You can make this a judgment about you, but it's really all about him and what he's attracted to.

      I was meaning to say that your looks only get you so far, and that working on "who you are" is more important than just "how you look."

      Seeking answers and growth is an attractive quality in a woman, so keep it up!

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • he probably resisted spending money on you or taking you out because he was on the rebound...and ya cause he did spend a lot of money on his previous girl, he probably doesn;t want to do that again for someone he didn't see himself stayin with

  • I think its all because of the other chick that dumped him, not you girl.

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