What qualities do you look for in a girlfriend?

What qualities do you look for in a girlfriend? My guy friend was telling me the other day he wanted to date his girlfriend because she was honest, fit in well with his guy friends, supportive of his passions, and shared the same goals. I was really impressed with his positive response.

Is this what all guys look for? Or what do you look for in a girlfriend?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I quit creating list of qualities that I look for for several reasons:
    1. I never follow them
    2. It's always changing
    3. They're often filled with too vague, overhyped, or overly common qualities
    4. I'm not always as honest, knowledgable, or as I should be when making them
    5. It encourages me to be more judgmental than curious.

    Instead I give instructions or set goals for myself and my relationships:
    1. Find someone who intrigues you more than they irritate you
    2. Find someone who both challenges and supports you
    3. Work on discovering, understanding, and appreciating who she is as well as who she wants to be
    4. Try to cooperate with her to make something that works for the both of you.
    5. Be attentive to what emotions/thoughts are motivating your behavior
    6. Don't ignore your suspicions, intuitions, feelings, or assumptions but don't let them control your decisions.
    7. Consider her future


Most Helpful Girl

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What Guys Said 63

  • I have the perfect wife! And to some degree we have grown together so we each understand each other better. But I will tell you the secret to success!

    A man and woman or any combination of partners must have unlimited freedom!

    So if the girl wants to say travel around the world she must be able to do that and if the boy say wants to rent a sailboat for a weekend he must have that freedom. Relationship is built on giving your partner everything they need without question. But perhaps more importantly it is critical to know that your boyfriend husband or partner cannot be changed by you they can only change themselves and you should never ever expect them to change no matter what. So if there is something you don't like about your boyfriend don't expect him to change.

    Finally of course there is trust. Trust that your partner won't cheat on you and trust that there will be no lies etc. but ultimately trust cannot overshadow freedom for without freedom no one can be happy in any relationship.

    • I really like and appreciate what you said here. Sometimes I worry about being held back in life. I want to travel the world and have a successful career and I need to know that he supports me 100%. He says he does but when push comes to shove and it's time to making decisions I wonder where that will leave us. 😔

    • @AsianFlower My first marriage was flawed. I thought I trusted her but I had rules. I didn't allow her to be free because she failed me in her freedom by maxing out credit cards and opening accounts in secret. This led to mistrust and more control by me which turned into less freedom for her and ultimate failure. My current marriage there is unlimited trust and freedom. So it will last.

      Ultimately you have to take risk. And trust the unknown. Life is full of risk but you must live full of life. Happiness is always a choice, You and you alone must choose to be sad or happy etc. no matter the outcome. Choose to be happy. It's the best way to live.

  • well first is attraction (looks, body, legs, etc) then its the stats, (str, intelligence, charisma, wisdom, etc) then its the personality (kind, honest, etc)
    and fianlly the skills ( organised, patience, etc)

    of course there not really in order but usually its the attraction first before the other 3 but i know that partners usually pair up not because they love them but they also have the skills that they dont have kinda thing, ya kinda looks like a game.

  • Well, I can say I have standards, and my standards are very high both physical looks and personality standards I have (for the kind of woman I want) are both equally high.

    However I also know that I am never going to get what I want. I know that will never happen.

    However none of this matters as I have decided to stay single till death!!.

    • What do you want so badly that no woman can fulfill?

    • @ALittleBlondeGirl.

      That's what I said in the end, if you read properly. I don't want anything ( badly), nothing.

      I just want to be single forever!.

      Yes, I know this doesn't answer your question, I do have my standards but then it's hard to explain and plus it's hard to explain so I'll leave it there.

  • I have my standards personality and looks wise. I wanted a girl with a cute face, and an okay body at least. With personality I wanted a girl who would love me, be able to have good conversations with me, and keep me company whenever needed. What I found was a damn adorable girl with a amazing body and she meets all my criteria and more with personality so, yay c: Sorry for the bragging about her I tend to do that a lot -_-

  • Non gynocentric, doesn't view her sexuality as more valuable than mine, doesn't view her life as more valuable than mine, isn't psychologically manipulative, would never ask me to marry her and knows I'll never ask her and knows why and is okay with it, would never take my children from me, would never use them as weapons, would never ask for more of me than she gives herself.

    And whose vagina doesn't smell like a rotting lemon or a dead animal.

    • wow you must have dated a bunch of crappy women.

    • Show All
    • @sparkly-crystal But people think I'm fucked up because I want to date 16 to 18 year olds, like "you're too old for that."

      They don't understand. It's not about their age -- it's about the generation they're a product of. It's about when they were born. Women who are 16 to 18 today are as nerdy and intellectual as us '80s guys ever were, except now it's cool. You can show feelings that aren't anger and they understand. Women my age don't understand the difference between stoicism and emotional retardation. They think men only experience a reduced set of emotions and anyone who actually feels something complex is a fag. But then they turn around and emotionally retard their own male children -- invalidate their feelings, leave them to cry, tell them to man up, etc.

    • @sparkly-crystal The '80s and '90s has nothing to offer BUT really crappy women. Maybe the early '90s, not so much the '97ers and younger.

  • I think a lot of guys want that, but don't look for that in a girl. a lot of guys simply aren't good with women.

    Anyways, for me I'm looking for a girl that's
    1. Truly kind to her core.
    2. Caring
    3. Playful/adventurous
    4. Genuinely herself
    5. Just the right amount of kink to match mine : )

  • I like girls who are out going and honest. I like meeting people who like me for me. Looks and interests are cool but what matters more to me is the quality of the person and how they are to others. Some may not have the same interests as me but that really doesn't matter. As long as they are honest with me and aren't playing tricks then I'm happy.

  • The first thing we look for is a look back... then we consider being naked... then we try to make jokes and cause laughter... then we try to get naked for real... then if she is honest and willing to get naked again we have found the right woman... and then...

  • Sounds like a good man, it all depends and what stage you are in life. i married the woman of my dreams and we couldnt be more happy together but dont change yourself for anyone honestly the thing that attracted me most to my wife was how happy and content she was with her own life at the time watching her kick ass at life and smiling everyday made me want to be with her and i can't deny her good looks either ;)

  • Mainly someone who can have intelligent conversations about things, who is trying to do things with their life that they care about. Laid back without being too submissive. Has at least relatively similar ethical / political values.

    I think everyone looks for different qualities, haha.

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What Girls Said 5

  • When I am looking for a girlfriend, I want someone who is casual, fun to be around, and has shown that she is willing to take steps to change things about herself/the world/her environment that she doesn't like.

  • I believe it differs from guy to guy, just like it differs from girl to girl what they are looking for in their partner.

  • These answers that you're getting, some of them are pretty damn entertaining.

  • The same qualities that I look for in a guy

  • Guys look for a girl who is a virgin or has had one sex partner, even if he slept with over a 100 women
    Really hot
    Can orgasm in 10 seconds
    Cleans and cooks and waits for him hand and foot


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