Should I reject him? If yes, how?

There's this guy I met from tennis whom I've had a great deal of respect for, and we became friends as we talk about sports and people in tennis a lot. I like him enough to wanna hang out (literally) with him, but I do not think I would like to take this down the romance road for 2 major reasons:

(i) The life reason - I have intentions to move from country to country the shoestring way, and I could tell he isn't into this lifestyle, and I do not want anyone to stop me from doing this
(ii) The shallow reason - Let's just say his physical appearance isn't my "type"

Looks simple enough, but there was one time we had a little misunderstanding which he ignored me for 2 days then came back to apologize. In those two days I was pretty confused and upset - this, I am not sure if it's because I like him, or am I just upset that I had a fight with a friend.

Should I reject this guy? He has told me his intentions to go for more dates by now and made me meet his best buddies :/


Most Helpful Guy

  • If you plan to move on, I would not even try to spend time with him. He probably does like you and you only want his company. You get what you want, but he doesn't. That isn't fair. Only clean way out of this is to just down play the friendship and sorta let him go and ignore him.

    • Yea I quite agree, but what's a good way to do it? We play the same sport in the same complex so I'll be seeing him very often, you know.

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    • But, like, we have so many mutual friends and it can be awkward for them as well :/ ARGH!

    • That is their problem.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Well you have some valid reasons to reject him. "Shallow" reasons count for more then most people would like to think. If you find yourself less attracted to him for certain reasons, whats the point? Would definitely become a factor later down the road if you found someone you feel is more attractive. Also he's displayed some inconsistent tendencies to ignore you, which is a bad sign. So yea, if you feel comfortable, perhaps its best to reject him.

    • Well my brain is telling me it's only right to reject..

      But I'll be seeing him very often through activities and stuffs.. Guess I'll need to find a way to break it to him.. and that's actually pretty damn tough.

    • Well sooner or later you should, it wouldn't be too difficult, unless you actually tell him you'd be rejecting him due to your lack of attraction towards him.

What Guys Said 2

  • For now those are not strong reasons to reject. You can will anyone into your plans provided there is love, unless the person is a stubborn type. Have you shared your plans with him and watch his reactions?

    • Well I've mentioned that I like budget travelling when he spoke of going to an island resort (obviously, posh stuffs, which I don't enjoy - and told him about this).

      I don't think I want anyone in this life plan of mine though, unless that person understands backpacking the way I do.

      Also the recent misunderstanding has caused the attraction level to drop here.

    • hmmmm it is ok, just follow your heart.

  • Well yes reject him...

    But how is his body that you find unattractive?

    • Not tall at the least. I'm 160cm tall and I enjoy wearing heels on and off. My guy needs to be at least 175cm.. but he's 168cm at best I think.

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    • Well heels are one reason, but it's not the only reason. I'd admit this is the shallow reason, but who's to say that doesn't count? If it doesn't why are guys hitting on hot chicks and not the ordinary looking ones?

      Get back to reality, anyone can be rejected for any reason - good, bad, shallow, deep or plain reality. For me, most importantly I need to do it.

      Question is how.

    • Well just tell him.. I am sure it won't work out anyways

What Girls Said 1

  • if u wouldn't like him you wouldn't care to get angry or anth like this. i would give u an advice to go on some more dates with him , so you get to know him better , his life , his goals , what would he like to do etc etc. and after you know him and his life completely it's your desicion if u would like to be more than friends or just stay like that. good luck

    • Well, I mean, in the misunderstanding he actually ignored, called me "attention seeking" and "pretentious" - just because I said something which he interprets as a rejection to go out @@ All I really did ask was "who's joining us for drinks this Saturday" :( I don't know..

      Kinda don't really wanna lead him on for too long either.

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    • Just break it to him and tell him that it's good height which is the problem and you don't wanna date him for that simple...
      Be truthful and let him go

    • @singlebee not the whole reason. Read the question again before you start criticizing.