He has backed off & I don't want to lose him?

I was seeing my best friend for a while before he moved away for his final year of Uni.
We are not official or exclusive.
When he first left he messaged me all the time, was super affectionate, messaged me when he was out & drunk & said he wanted to be with me when the year was over.
Now he has settled in & when back for the weekend we are good, spend all our time together, kiss, cuddle, I join in on family things etc. but when he goes back i hear nothing from him for days at a time.

He messaged me yesterday after being back there for over a day saying that he was sorry he hadn't messaged, had been busy & missed me. I said that its ok I was busy too & to have a good day. I haven't heard from him since.

I haven't messaged him because once he started backing off I felt like I was being too clingy & so I am giving him space to figure out where his head is at. I'm just worried he will replace me or forget me (even though he says he won't).


What Guys Said 1

  • You two should seriously mutually agree on what is considered normal and frequent communication between you two. Otherwise you will never know exactly how the other feels if you communicate in a haphazard way like this.


What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think there is a problem here. Not texting for a day is really no big deal. Sure, he probably used to more when he first went back to school and unfortunately the situation may be getting a little old and the honeymoon phase is calming down and that is always hard for girls to accept, however, he still seems to be messaging a perfectly normal amount for the situation and he apologized for when he didn't message. Keep busy and don't revolve your life around his messages, fill up your time with friends and other hobbies so you're not so focused on this.