Inexperienced at 50. Is that OK?

It appears that, during my teens, 20s, 30s, or 40s, I somehow never figured out how to be successful in the "dating game", but I don't want to give up just yet. However, at age 50, I feel concerned that I may have missed my "launch window", for a stimulating sex life. Yet, I'm trying to rebuild my self-image.

I've heard numerous people say that it's very unsexy to be 50 years old without any dating experience. I'd like to have an estimate of what percentage, of women, really feel that way.

If my age, along with my lack of experience, really do limit my dating options, I wonder if there's any way around that -- some way to transcent the limitations that my condition may be imposing on me.

Comments welcome.


Most Helpful Girl

  • The sexiest thing a man can do in the bedroom (at least for me) is have some confidence. If you don't have that, at least try to fake it until you make it. I have personally never dated someone in their 50's, but I have dated inexperienced men. I appreciate that they're upfront with me and they have the courage to be open. I know for some men it's embarrassing. Don't let you experience (or lack of) hold you back. I think it's great that you're wanting to get out there and meet some ladies. My advice is to be open minded, don't overthink it, and by honest with them. Good luck!


Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm going to tell you bluntly - most women find it unattractive. Most women by their early to mid -20's- have had it with inexperienced guys. I've heard women at age 25-26 sleep with a guy and if he wasn't good figure 'he's not going to learn now'. Most women like guys who take charge and are confident as well. I think you knew all this, but it's the harsh reality. I'll additionally even throw out there that if you're in a decent spot in life and in okay shape, you can certainly get younger women to date you, but younger women in PARTICULAR tend to like older guys for their experience and confidence. The last thing they want is an old guy who has all the flaws of a teenager.

    Well that sucks, right? Ready for some good news?

    You don't need decades of experience. If you really push yourself out of your comfort zone you can be more 'experienced' and confident and skilled than most guys your age by a year from now. Think of it like driving a car. If you'd never driven at your age, you'd be way behind. If you spent a year taking driving lessons, getting your lesson, then taking advanced driving courses at a track, you'd be an above average driver by the end of the year. Easily.

    Same idea. Sitting around won't fix this. Yeah, it's gonna be an issue early on. THere's no magic beyond getting through that.


What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Guys Said 5

  • Missed the launch window? Yeah that's a bit of understatement there. It's like the ship already sailed reached the destination and made the trip back. Anyway what you can do if you've got money is become the so called "sugar daddy" you can get some young girl to do anything you want for money (and I mean anything) but they ain't cheap

    Believe it or not there will be some virgin women around your age. . . they're rare but they're out there

    If you're up for it you could go for the hardcore no sex outside of religion type. You're chaste, their chaste what could go wrong? (you're a virgin right?)

    ^ That's the truth right there

    Also around the 40's there could be quite a few lonely women out there, you can take advantage of the lonely desperate type since they'll take what they can get

  • Anon,

    It's never too late and here's why:

    First, approaching women for dates and dating in general is something all guys fumble around with. ALL of us.

    The guys that do it all the time are good at it. The ones who don't are not, but it is a skill that can be learned, just like tennis, piano, or learning French.

    If you were 80 years old, I'd tell you it's too late. 50 is nothing.

    Second, like HolyGuac mentioned, inexperienced dudes and awkward dating or sexual encounters is something all women have experienced.

    Now, if you focus on meeting someone special (and not just a sex buddy), when you add in caring and even love, the awkwardness becomes less of an issue. So, relax on that.

    Finally, you might see your lack of experience as a "defect" but you forget that most middle-aged, single dudes have a TON of baggage (ex-wives, kids, issues).

    So, if a woman your age meets you, she might think you're kind of different, but also better because you don't have all the BS baggage other guys might have in a relationship. For a lot of women, that makes you a pretty good catch!

  • This is totally gonna be me.

    Online dating dude.

  • wow... forget it dude. Life is almost over for you.

  • You mean you have never dated any girl?

    • Is that so hard to believe? I was in my early thirties before I had my first date.

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