Why is it wrong to openly admit enjoying traditional qualities?

Why is it bad for a man to desire a very distinctly feminine body, to say they want a woman can run a household, a nurturing force, a "girly girl" who needs him to protect her etc. etc.

why is it bad for a woman to desire a man with a distinctly masculine body and appearance, to say they want a man who is a big provider (makes money,) is the leader, a protective force, a "man's man" who she feels safe with?

Don't you think a part of sexual attraction is in desire the traditional traits of the gender you're attracted to as you see them? As in, if I see blonde hair as feminine and I'm attracted to women it would make sense to be most attracted to blonde women? Am I missing something?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't see anything wrong with it. Everyone has different preferences. Some women just feel offended because maybe they're the type that wants to work and be independent, and be able to do things without having the support of a man. It does kind of make you feel powerful in a way, or like a strong woman.

    What I do find strange however is the guys that complain about women living off the provider (him) as a housewife. And at the same time they complain about feminism (who try to make females independent and not live off the man's earnings).

    Anyhow society is illogical and confused.

    Personally I like manly guys who are protective and whom I feel safe with. But I would prefer not being a house wife simply because chores and household work is really not for me. 😅


Most Helpful Guy

  • Feminists and MRAs have convinced men and women that gender roles are oppressive and that they should be completely destroyed, so they get offended when you encourage and say you like these things. Then there are those who just don't fit those descriptions so they get mad too.


What Girls Said 7

  • As far as you (a boy), saying you are looking for traditionally feminine qualities, there are 2 kinds of negative reactions that come to mind here.

    The things yr saying might seem TOO GENERIC -- like YOU aren't selective enough, or passionate enough about anything specific.
    Ya know?
    The best analogy I have here is this: It's kinda like someone's asking you what you want to do for a career, and you say "Something that makes a ton of money." LOL
    I mean... obviously that's something lots and lots of people want, but, just as obviously, you could see why MOST people would think you were basically a passionless, uninteresting robot -- basically, not even human -- if you gave that kind of response.

    Yr responses might seem REPRESSIVE.

    This is all a function of HOW you say things -- and also TO WHOM you say them.

    If you say you like a woman who can cook and clean, for instance, there's DEFINITELY a wrong -- very wrong -- way of saying that. Lmao.
    Like, a way of saying that that comes off like "I don't ever want my woman to leave the house on her own" kinda thing. Like you'd want to control every molecule of her being and her life.

    And, of course, sometimes you are just dealing with the wrong audience. There's some people to whom you just CAN'T say things like this without them being convinced that you hate all women, etc.
    Ironically, most of those people are men (I think these are the types you like to call "white knights", if I am not mistaken).


    And, in terms of women talking about men?




    I mean, if YOU heard a woman say she was looking for a "big provider", what would YOU think of her and her character?
    Probably just as little as I would.

    • Also, I don't know what you are trying to do with yr last paragraph, but... srsly? Hair colors are inherently sexed, now?

  • I think you are talking about raw biological forces and urges. Since not everyone fits those descriptions, they feel devalued that you prefer the natural selection concept.

  • I totally agree. And while I may not need a protector, there is something so sexy about a man who not only could but would do that for me.

  • I don't think it's bad. Some women like the traditional roles, not being the one in control and having a man to take care of them in some aspects. Other women consider the traditional role as demeaning.

    I personally want to be with someone who is a big provider and is in charger or like you said a protective force. It just depends on the woman.

  • Nothing wrong with it.
    It may get uncomfortable, though, when a guy turns out to be not traditional, but oppressive - as in trying to force the wife to stay home and give up her career.

  • I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Everyone has a type.

  • Yes you are missing something and I think it's called modern feminism.

    • modern feminism doesn't make the rules for everyone anymore than traditional gender roles makes the rules. My problem is with either side trying to do so instead of just letting people think for themselves.

    • Show All
    • Maybe I should come to US then, lol.

    • lol you like traditional femininity?

What Guys Said 3

  • Because we live in an overly liberal society where simply possessing a penis instantly renders you a patriarchy enforcing rapist. Let alone wanting to be dominant in the relationship.

  • i wonder this myself

  • F E M I N I S M