How can I learn to reject guys who I feel nothing towards?

i mean i have no problem rejecting guys who just aren't my type at all, guys im not attracted to, and guys with a lot of deal breakers. im also very picky (not because i expect a guy to look like a model and just be perfect, but because i just have my own type, i like what i like) but then there are some guys who i just can't seem to reject. the ones who are attractive, have nice personalities, no bad habits, hard working, just really good on paper. but i just dont genuinely like them. i like everything about them, but not actually them. and every single time i make the same mistake. i always date them hoping my feelings will change and increase, and they dont. but the worst part is that they end up breaking up with me after realizing we're just not that good together. and then i feel stupid because i could've just listening to my instincts from the start and not even had started the relationship. and then i just feel depressed. how do i avoid this?


What Guys Said 2

  • You probably have enough experience now to know this now. So when you sense this, that he's great but you don't like him, then don't go out with him hoping for change because, as you know now from experience, it won't happen. If you're really not sure though and you're worried about the guys feelings just be completely honest with him from the beginning. If nothing else, he should appreciate the honesty.

    • yeah you are right. i should just think about whether dating him will benefit me in the future or not. right now im talking to this guy, we've been talking for about a month, and i just dont really feel anything for him. he's really considerate and caring and i appreciate that but i just dont get excited to see him or anything like that. well now im starting to feel stupid because for the last couple of days he hasn't been calling me as much so i asked him today why he's been acting different, and he said he just doesn't know about us. a part of me is like wow we're on the same page. but then another part of me feels like if i just let him go so easily, i'll be missing out. but then its like i know im lying to myself.

    • Yes, you want to like him but if the connection isn't there then it's not and that's very important. I often experience this with women to.

    • yeah, i should just let him go huh.

  • Consider lowering your ( obviously ) high standard. I expect these guys broke up because you may have been giving off the signs that you would prefer to be having your gums scraped than be with them

    • obviously high standards? the only standards i have are he has to be taller then me (im only 5'1), have a cute face in my opinion, have a fit body (just like me), make the same amount of money as me, no bad habits (just like i dont have any), be respectful, and have a somewhat similar personality. oh yeah im definitely asking too much.

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    • Let me rephrase that... Haven't found

    • of course i've dated guys like that before, they are very rare (most guys dont seem to have much manners or like to play games) but things do end eventually for one reason or another. i dont always have guys breaking up with me, just the ones who im not sure about. the ones who are just perfect on paper, yet i dont feel anything towards them. i end up feeling like im just dragging on an empty relationship and eventually they get on the same page as me and realize our relationship is basically pointless so they end it. and i feel dumb because i know i could've ended it myself a long time ago. dont know why i dragged them out for so long

What Girls Said 0

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