What do I need to change?

So, I have the problem of not being able to make any female friends (and as a result, no girlfriend either...). I don't really know what I'm doing wrong.

I'm a college sophomore, and I have been trying for numerous semesters to make friends and even acquaintances, but to no avail. I try and start off by asking about something pertaining to the class, and I try to get the conversation going from there. Unfortunately, that method seems to to fail almost every time. So I'm lost as to what to do. All that happens is i try to start the conversation, and then the individual just doesn't seem interested. I have tried intiating conversations with a wide variety of girls, but no luck. I suffer from depression and social anxiety, and it's difficult to muster up the courage to start a conversation with anyone. It's been so discouraging to try and fail to make any acquaintances. I doubt that it's just coincidence or bad luck, because it happens way to often. I must be doing something wrong.

Here is just a example conversation I have had.

me: what did you think of (insert poem name)?

girl: eh... It was okay, although I prefer plays instead of poems. I like writing them, but I hate reading them.

me: really? I always had trouble reading plays, so I'm not much of a fan of plays.

girl: try watching them on YouTube. That's what i do and it helps.

me: I'll try it, thanks.

girl: no problem.

the conversation went on, but I can't remember the precise wording

after having a fairly long conversation, the next time i saw her, she merely ignored me. I thought, after a decent conversation, we would at least become acquaintances, but regrettably we did not. That has been the case for every single conversation I have with anyone. I dont know what it is that I'm doing, but any ideas on what I could do to improve my chances?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Dude, I have the same problem. I have only 1 female friend (we're just friends; nothing more) and a couple of male friends. I have difficulties when it comes to meeting new people and especially girls. I've asked my female friend (so many times) questions like:"What do girls like", how to make friends etc.". The answers are always similar if not the same.
    Just develop the courage to approach people, talk and stop being afraid of rejection or.. I don't know. Also try not to be a boring person. You don't have to talk about something spectacular; talk about something simple, just a quick everyday conversation.
    Oh, I almost forgot. Did you seriously expect the girl to become a friend of yours, just because of a 1 min. conversation? Find interesting topics to talk about and make it obvious that you want to get to know her!
    Good luck!

    • Well that was just a example, and I have been in 2 different courses with that girl. So that's why it was odd since I have had quite a few conversations with her.

What Girls Said 1

  • Oh man. At least you are starting conversations. I am not even doing that. Are you looking to talk to girls who already have a lot of people to talk to? Sometimes people only have a certain amount of friends and don't have time for any more of them.


What Guys Said 0

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