Yesterday I approached my boyfriend (ex now) with an issue that has been bothering me for awhile. Just a little background on us – we’re both in our late 20’s and have been together for 4 years. I’ve had a feeling that my boyfriend has been in communication with one of his female co-workers for about 3-4 weeks now. I know that he goes out with his co-workers from time to time, but I just had a feeling that he’s been texting this one female co-worker a lot. I’ve asked him a lot of questions this past 2 weeks to try to get a sense of how frequently this communication is, but he hasn’t answered truthfully. So last week we get something to eat and she texted him. He left his phone in the car because we were listening to music on his phone and he went inside to pick up our carry out order. I saw her name pop up and took a mental note of that because I knew I was going to bring up this subject pretty soon. I have the password to his phone, but I don’t snoop in his phone. So this feeling I have grew stronger over this past weekend, and I finally approached him about it yesterday over the phone. I asked him if he was in communication with her this past weekend, and his answer was no, and I also told him that I saw that she texted last week when we were getting something to eat, and his response was that he didn’t respond to her, which is a lie. So yesterday while on the phone, I asked him to take a screenshot of his text messages from Saturday, and I told him to promise me that he wouldn’t delete anything. Before he sent the screenshot, I already knew that he was texting her yesterday. So he promised that he wouldn’t delete anything, and of course, their text conversation didn’t appear in the screen shot, which means he deleted it. So I took drastic measures because I knew I was being lied to and it hurts so bad. I told him that I was going to come see him after he got off work so we can review his phone records. I can't fit all the details here. Please review the rest below.
He had no clue that you could pull phone records online through your phone company. He agreed, because he didn’t know that that was possible and of course he deleted everything. He then called me back and said that I have to trust him and that he refuses to have my snoop through his phone because that’s just going to cause spiral effect of not having trust in our relationship. He stressed that I have to trust him and that if I’m still requesting this information, then basically our relationship
is over because he knows I’m not going to want to continue without finding out if he’s lying or not. I told him that I could easily access his phone records to see if he’s lying without him there. So after about an hour of going back and forth, I got off the phone and told him that I can’t be in a relationship with someone I can’t trust. BUT, after we got off the phone I just wanted to show him how hurt I was for him lying to me and that he really tried to make me feel dumb by accessing