Am I just out of luck?

So I'm a sophomore in college and I've never had a serious relationship... I don't have any friends. My family has basically abandoned me. I'm just alone. I suffer from severe depression and have for years, and i suffer from social anxiety. I'm honestly pathetically medicated and my doctor refues to try anything new. I just got out of honestly a very petty relationship with a girl i met off of tinder and I'm back to feeling shitty and laying in bed all day. I want to meet a woman, but honestly I don't like the choices of where I could meet a woman. I could try at the college, but college girls are so damn immature and annoying or they're taken. Any park is out because there are none around here. I want to make friends, but I find men to be so ignorant and annoying that I refuse to deal with them. Clubs are out because my college has really pathetic club options. My college doesn't hold hardly any events. So I'm just out of luck i guess. Honestly right now I'm fighting the urge to find a bridge. Nothing really seems worth it anymore. And I'm not going back to therapy...


What Girls Said 1

  • You keep calling girls immature or annoying, you keep calling men ignorant and annoying..
    ... Maybe the problem is you and no one else.

    • How so? They gossip, insult and joke about things they have no right to talk about. They bitch when someone disagrees with them. I'm not the one who is the problem. I'm just not willing to join in on the ignorant "fun"

What Guys Said 1

  • Ouch, that's tough. I was halfway into reading your question when I was about to suggest all the things you ruled about (making friends of the same gender, attending clubs, etc).

    I'm a bit stumped at the moment with the depression and ruling all these other avenues out.

    Your depression might give you a harsher but more realistic outlook in life which might make it hard to relate to those easy-going peers. If you're kind of a social outcast, you're outside that group that's kind of being stupid and having youthful fun, turning you into a critic with a very cynical outlook.

    One possible route is to kind of try to suspend that stupidity radar and make an effort to join in the dumb fun, see what all the superficial nonsense people are into is really about. Try to find one nice friend (male or female) who can kind of give you a tour guide into that social side of the world.

    An extreme alternative is a drastic change in scenery. Different places have very different types of people, more varied the further you go.

    In any case, you have to kind of put yourself out there if you want a chance at all of these kinds of social things everyone enjoys. There's a bustling world full of people out there, right outside that home, that's active 24/7. There's endless opportunities to meet someone of some interest if you actively seek them out.

    Try not to judge the sum of your life on your ability to get laid or be invited to places with friends. Doing that will often lead to an outlook and behavior that will very precisely prevent you from such opportunities.

    • My ex-girlfriend was the "friend" that introduced me into the superficial fun, and I still thought it was pointless and a waste of time.
      Scenery change is also out since I'm barely scraping by at the pathetic state university I'm at.
      As for the getting laid and invitations, I'm not really interested in that. I don't want friends. I just want one person who i can share myself with. I get too exhausted when dealing with numerous individuals and grow irritated by having to constantly keep up with what thay are saying.
      I'm not interested in social activities, I just want a relationship where I don't have to deal with anyone but her.

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    • As for the prime thing, don't worry about that! I used to think that way all the time (still do) but it's kind of a flawed style of thinking. For me, my true prime was late 20s. I met a girl that I had the most intense feelings for during that period, the best sex (sometimes all night long and couldn't stop fantasizing about her the day after), still in very good health, and having the best time in my life around then.

      Now I'm in my 30s and keep thinking I need to have more fun before I reach 40s so that I don't waste this "prime". I'll probably shift it to 50s when I reach 40s.

    • As it stands i take 18 hour semesters and I'll be in grad school for about 5 to 7 years. I'll be out of my bachelors work by 2018 so I'll be between 26 and 28 when I get out of grad school. I'm not much of a person to be able to live for myself, and honestly I don't really like the idea of dating past 30 so yeah...๐Ÿ˜…