Would you date this guy?

i understand being a single mom at my age, my options are limited, so i am gave this guy a 3rd date.
ea. date i found out a bit more...
1. 20s... lots of guys don't know what they want - fine
2. 30s... still a blur -- ooookkkkkkaaayyyy?
3. 40s.. 1st serious girlfriend. he moved for his job she didn't want to marry him or move with him.
now i met him 3rd time, he wants to see me more but i am not feeling it..

he found a way to not complete his GED but got into a communictiy college (2 years. college) way back then. somehow completed 4 years. his 30s was a blur...
now 49 said he would like to go back to school to work on his Graduate degree (masters degree)

i don't need a rocket scientist, but i sense more than lacking motivation/ambition

3rd date, he said he woke up at noon. met me around 7 after dinner, walked around. i got a book and was fascinated with the pictures sitting at park bench
around 10:30ish.. he said he was getting sleepy...
wore the same shirt as 2nd date, wore falling apart sneakers.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He sounds like a mess.

    Single moms don't have many options sure, especially at your age (as you acknowledge), but that doesn't mean you can't point out these red flags and start making demands.

    Maybe this guy needs to be pushed. His life story is anyone else's tale of regret. A complete dud, or a sincere lack of attention to detail.

    Start pulling mental levers to see if he responds in ways that signal a reasonable person underneath this facade. If not, then... Your call.

    • thank you for your sincere response. i think i will move on, wait for the next guy. hope better than this one...
      so far not much luck :P

Most Helpful Girl

  • No. Why are you desperate? You don't need a relationship.

    • why?

    • Show All
    • We all want to love and be love. And being selective will limit my options. So I did give the guy 3 dates. I m not desperate to the point I would get a friends with benefits.
      What do you mean by wait?
      I am also learning the type of men I atrract, and they seem to be the same type, it's disappointing.

    • Yeah you're desperate and you obviously aren't even trying to understand what I'm saying. Good luck.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 4

  • Avoid at all costs. He's a manchild and hasn't matured. He'll act like a kid and will drive you crazy, and you're already not feeling it after 3 dates? Don't ignore your gut and find a guy you deserve.

    • I seem to attract these... Sigh. Ex husband, ex boyfriend now this. That's why I m able to spot some of the red flag. Now what? Lol... Alone forever?

    • Lol no of course not x I've had a pattern of emotionally unavailable men before now. But i think the key for me was being happy with myself and knowing what I deserved from a man. I can honestly say that I am really happy in my life and in a really good place now.
      If you have everything you need and you're happy with who you are, maybe try dating a few guys who don't fall into your type. It might surprise you.

  • If you aren't feeling then you aren't feeling it. Are you trying to settle or date someone just to have someone there? Because you clearly do not seem that interested so just move on, there is not much to question.

    • thats exactly it... am i just trying to settle. i can accept a lot, but this seem way too off.
      i also understand my options are limited, but seriouly this is really disappointing!!

    • Show All
    • Would love to hear some of your stories 😊

    • Don't give up!!

  • No. He's married with kids.

    • no. single, never married. lost his job from the south. moved to the east coast, after he got a job... the girlfriend doesn't want to move with him. he met someone for a 3 months. he still wanted to be with the ex. girlfriend. ended the 3 months. ex. girlfriend. said no. so he is looking agin.
      i called at times when it is suppose to be "family time" so... i can tell when guys are married. dealt with a few of those.

  • he sounds iffy to me... it's up to you.