Whats the difference between being "Too available" and "Not putting enough effort in"?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm too available? Like I talk on phone to her twice a day and text nearly all day long. We both naturally flow there's not really any awkward silences, we make each other laugh, similar interests bla bla but I wonder if I should just back off a bit, do my own thing, tell her I'm not available to talk when she does etc. I have phases where I kinda just want some time to myself but, if I like her & wanna take things further I'm supposed to want to talk to her as much as possible aren't I?

But on flip side I wonder if that would come across like I'm not putting any or as much effort in?

What do you think?


Most Helpful Girl

  • If you need some time for yourself you should male that time for yourself. You are basically giving up your life to be with her which is not really great. You should make her feel special when you are spending time with her but you shouldn't neglect your own life. In the end she should be a part of your life not your whole life. This would come across as needy at some point eventually.

    • Yeah I know what you mean. I'm definitely not clingy or needy, I just have this feeling she'll be like one of these girls who loses interest if I say I can't talk to her. She might think I don't care or not interested, when I am. Thank you.

    • Its the right balance I'm struggling with without offending her. I know she's pretty understanding though.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • I've read on here about how couples text twice a day only and it drives me crazy! Like NO! I want you to text me as much as you can not just when you want to. Then I'll just feel like a option. What you're doing is perfect it let's her know that you're dedicated to her! Keep doing what you're doing!

  • Don't keep texting her too much, reply like 5mins late each time or 10(but still reply), maybe you can text her "hey I'm busy rn but when I'm done, I'll text you" it'll kind of suck and just I don't know tbh it's hard.


What Guys Said 0

Be the first guy to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!