Why does being nice to women from the start tend to drive them into the hands of other men?

It's a phenomenon guys face all across the world. Where being nice to a girl from the start tends to drive her away into another person's arms. A lot of guys don't want to act like assholes or indifferent to women but that seems to be the how you get anywhere these days.

Why does being nice to women from the start tend to drive them into the hands of other men?Why do men have to turn themselves into monsters to be seen more than a friend for women?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Your kind of trying to attract a woman by demonstrating feminine qualities, that would work on lesbian if you had a vagina. Think about it if a woman wanted nice they'd date women. Just because your nice doesn't mean a girl will drop her panties, they need to wooed, challenged, flirted with and above all won by a testosterone fuelled red blooded male. I know SJW's are promoting gender neutrality and male castration but at the back of it all not even the most ardent feminist will let a guy with a mangina screw her. I recommend you vist tge Return of Kings website to drop this nice/bitter bullshit and get solid dating and sex advice.

    • That's a nice way to put it, associating this behavior with femininity and a general lack of masculinity.

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    • For sure.

    • @ak666 Return of kings budd it will change your life. thanks for mho

What Girls Said 1

  • It doesn't. There is nothing inherently unattractive about being nice, and nothing attractive about being a 'bad boy'.

    Women are very simple compared to men. We are either interested in you or we are not. If we do like you, then we can't just turn our feelings off like men do. If we don't like you, we usually never will.

    We often unknowingly choose the wrong men. 'Bad boys' always pretend to be nice at first, and it is easy to fall for it, if you fancy him. 'Bad boys' get rejected too, it's just that they don't care, so will not be online posting about it, they will just move on to the next girl.

    If we don't fancy a 'nice guy', it is not because he's nice. We're just not attracted to him.

    • "Women are very simple compared to men."

      Lol no. women are never simple compared to men even pole results and question asked by gag both men and women found women complicate dating and make things more troublesome than it has to be.

      Even the guy below said that him being nice to a girl who was interested in him drove her away.

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    • https://youtu.be/DmP1ier3R30

      before a girl says yes while a woman just needs to look pretty and go in a public area and guys would come up to her and offer to hang out with him.

    • @BubbleBoy69 You're delusional, I'm not lying to you. I have no reason to try to sugarcoat things to a stranger on the internet.

      You asked for opinions and you got one. What you do next is up to you, but I'm not repeating myself.

What Guys Said 3

  • You can be kind to women and lure their sexual interest as long as you don't do it the "nice guy" way. It's mostly attitude.

    Those types of "nice guys" can often be spotted a mile away. You might notice them in your social group where the guy is obviously being so sweet to a girl because he likes her. It's often accompanied by a mindset like, "She deserves to be with someone who cares about her (i. e., me)." And that mindset is ultimately selfish, because it wouldn't apply if there were 10 other nice guys being nice to her and competing for her attention. Each one would think they deserve her because they care about her.

    Women are attracted to attractive qualities. Being caring isn't one of the top ones there. It's not for us either. I'm not suddenly going to fall in love with an overweight girl I find unattractive because she's being so kind to me. We're no better in this sense.

    Too many Hollywood romance films make us think that the guy who cares the most about the girl is ultimately going to win the girl. This isn't at all like reality. In real life, the guy who is most attractive to a girl gets the girl.

    Realizing this is ultimately a game of attraction is one the keys to turning things around if you fit in this "nice guy" category.

    • "It's not for us either."

      Yeah you really shouldn't speak on behalf of men for this part. Research shows men attraction towards women increases if she is kind. It make sense because it is linked to nurturing qualities which a man would look for in the mother of his children.

      See mytake for more detail: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a28827-nice-guy-nice-girl-fully-analyzed

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    • i never said you'd become attracted to them but being kind increases a woman's attraction in a man's eyes. It is in top 5 things men look for in mates because it's a quality a man would want for the mother of his children.

    • @BubbleBoy69 That's probably quite true, and I can agree strongly with that. Where "nice guys" go wrong to me is that they usually place a bit too much emphasis on kindness and caring being an attractive quality that can override all others. Aside from that, there is typically an expectation or at least strong hope that the female will become interested as a result. One way to tell -- the evidence surrounds us. Look at this MyTake from a seemingly-bitter nice guy who was disappointed that the women went towards other men. There should be no disappointment if there was no expectation that being kind would suddenly lure her interest towards him.

  • You are right, it does seem that way. I've had similar opinions. Doesn't make sense, but some girls are attracted to total jerk offs or indifferent people. I am convinced that I lost someone special last year because after 2 months of dating, I expressed how much I liked her, and she ran. I would just be yourself, and not play games like being indifferent or act like a jerk if it's not you. Who cares if she runs. Someone will come along who won't run, and that's the one you want to hang around with.

  • there's a difference between being nice and being a doormat.

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