Is he interested in me or just unsure?

He is a very shy guy, recently divorced only a couple of months ago after his wife of 9 years cheated on him. He and I hit it off instantly talking up until 2 to 4 am on work nights. He is very secretive and mysterious but has been opening up to me a lot recently about his family, childhood, fears/dreams/goals/future, and feelings.

He has made statements like:
"I really like you a lot."
"I am no good for you/ I do not want to lead you on."
"I want you to like me but I do not want to hurt you."
"I'm damaged goods/ I'm broken."
"I am not sure if I believe in love."
"You are very sweet and super smart."
"You belong to me/ You are mine."
"I'm not sure if I am ready for a serious relationship right now."

Very confusing with mixed signals. -_-
When we are together he is the one trying to cuddle, kiss, hug, he is ALWAYS touching or rubbing me. Even after being intimate. He would stand behind me in front of mirrors holding me while leaning his head against my neck. He even kissed me in public after we agreed on no PDA. I notice that he made me breakfast and would serve me and clean up after.

He told me that I do not need him because I have tons of men wanting me and he gets upset or jealous if I mention a date or message one while in his presence. He ask and wants pictures about the various men that I see, but never mentions or shows me the females he talks to or date.

He stated that he is looking for a soulmate.

When together he would ask me questions about where I see myself in 5/10 years, if I wanted kids/ what would you do if "we" got pregnant, about my family and wants to see pictures.

He remembers everything that I tell him and has even stated that he mentioned me to his friends and family... I haven't met anyone that he knows! I states that he wants to be friends and see me every so often, but still wants to talk regularly (all day and night). I have been moving on, but this guy is just so confusing. Is he just keeping me around until he finds his keeper?


Most Helpful Girl

  • He likes you but he's been through a divorce. I've been through a divorce and I can tell you that you feel really disillusioned with the idea of happy ever after, you question your ability to make the right choice (how did I stuff up so bad?), you feel like you have this baggage and stigma that will always be with you and why would someone love you when you've got an ex who might still be in yourife if you have kids and are they going to doubt your abity to be a good partner when you already failed once. If you have kids you are afraid about whether you can find someone who will accept and love them. You find it hard to trust someone because your trust has been broken in a pretty bad way. The plus side of it, I know that I really spent time evaliatong myself, my life, what is important, etc... and I have learned a lot that I would not have otherwise learned.

    • he does not have kids, he stated that he didn't really love her that he was pressured into marriage. he even admitted that he was not affectionate with her.

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    • Hmmm... deep

    • Yeah it is... I just wanted to try give you some perspective of what he is possibly going through so you can understand his apprehension to mpve forward at times is not likely to be anything to do with how much he cares about you.

What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Dude, leave him alone. He literally just divorced his wife. He is probably very sad and angry because she cheated. Just leave him alone

    • He actually didn't love her married her because he was forced to. He wants to date and he says he is ready.

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    • Both families.

    • He told me.

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