After 4 months of no contact, I don't know what to text her. Please Help! Need answers quickly.

Background: I used to talk to this girl for a few months...we used to text a lot and we hung out a few times. Eventually, however, we stopped contact because she stopped being willing to hang out.

Now: It had been 4 months since I heard from her and she was on my mind a lot, so today I decided to text her. It took me a lot of effort because I sort of felt like a fool the last time I asked her to hang out (she did this thing where she'd act interested in hanging out but ultimately wouldn't). But the text I sent her was light and teasing and pertained to an inside joke we had. She replied to me and played along with it, trying to be funny.

I didn't reply to her because now I'm not sure how to take it from here. Technically, her reply doesn't need a response from me, but there's something clever/funny/teasing I can say in response to it, so I was planning on replying tomorrow. But then I don't know what to do. First of all, she might not even respond to my text. Secondly, if she does respond, I'm not sure how to transition into asking her to lunch or hanging out. Should I wait a few days before asking her? Because asking too soon might seem to sudden. Should I say the funny thing then wait another few days before suddenly asking her to lunch? Or should I build up to it? She's the type of girl who's busy a lot, so I also need tips on how to kind of ask her what day's she's free to go to lunch without sounding like I'm kissing up to her or putting her on the spot.

I'm a little scared of asking her to hang out again after what happened last time. I really hope I don't embarrass her and most of all, I don't embarrass myself. Let me make it clear that we did hang out a couple times in the past and we used to talk a lot.

Also, part of the problem is that I don't know if her reply was something like "I don't care if he responds" or if it was like a "yay, I want to talk to him."


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What Girls Said 1

  • Okay listen, just say that you were thinking about her since you hadn't heard from her in a while and wanted to know if she would like to catch up on things. Don't say hang out- first make sure she is willing to even still talk to you like she was before and then offer to hang out with her. If you do this and she refuses, just move on; if she really likes you in that way, she won't let herself lose all contact with you like that again.


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