If dating someone experienced in relationships, sex etc. and you aren't when should you let them know?

This girl surprised me at the end of a date when I was gonna peck her on the cheek, she kissed me on the lips. Was a bit funny/awkward haha cause it was my first kiss (if i can even call it that lol). I guess I'm thinking things are gonna escalate next time and it's probably gonna be obvious to her if we start making out that I haven't experienced this stuff before.

Should I tell her before we next meet or just try go with the flow and hope for the best?

So I texted her today and she said she enjoyed meeting me, but wasn't feeling it!

Anyone want to try explain this confusing women's behaviour? Haha.
Why would she kiss me at the end of the date if she didn't want to see me again?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I was the one who was knew to everything in my relationship. I told him because I knew I would shy away from it at first, and I did. It helped him realize I wasn't rejecting him, and he had more patients! He also was not afraid to give feedback on what he preferred since I didn't know what to do. It worked out well.
    I don't know if it would be different for you since you are the guy. As a female if a guy told me I would like that he trusted me enough to tell me, and it wouldn't change my mind on wanting to date him

    • Yeah thats my concern cause as a guy maybe its perceived as some kind of weakness, whereas i think many guys would see the girl as being cute and innocent. If she likes me enough, maybe it won't bother her? What do u think? I mean she kissed me on the lips after the first date, would she really turn me down for this, given her attraction to me?

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    • Then got for it and have fun!! I think you found your answer!

    • Thanks, I will! If in doubt, I'll just smile and look cute haha

Most Helpful Guy

  • Awesome, congrats.

    >> Should I tell her before we next meet or just try go with the flow and hope for the best?

    I think somewhere in the middle. Maybe do a bit more kissing and so forth and then say you're not so experienced about these things.

    If you get her in the bedroom, you'll probably have all these nerves going so late into the game without experiencing the real deal. Try to calm yourself, take it slow, don't be afraid to touch her body and also communicate a bit. The communication part if you ask her what she wants and likes will already give you a big advantage since it usually takes a bit of experience with multiple women to understand how important that is.

    And if you get into a relationship, remember to be the bigger person, keep yourself calm, don't argue, don't escalate. You'll often have a lot of intense emotions you never experienced quite that way before with your first girlfriend, and probably more than usual given how late in life you got one. Strive to be the bigger person that deescalates conflicts and doesn't act negatively on his emotions.

    • Thanks, great advice. I think more kissing and touching will help me feel more comfortable. But yeah could casually say im not too experienced without making a big deal out of it. I think she sees me as a confident guy. I mean I've changed heaps in recent months. Used to have social anxiety and depression but now im going out to clubs, dancing, chatting to strangers etc.

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    • There's something I didn't understand about masculinity and mental toughness when I first got a girlfriend I seriously cared about. I thought being tough was about being courageous in the face of physical danger. I didn't realize it also meant not acting cold and distant when I'm angry or upset, to not start going paranoid if I'm insecure or feeling inadequate. Perhaps you already know this, but I didn't, and in the case you didn't, that's a challenge to be faced ahead.

    • Its cool, im good with speaking my mind and emotions. And i feel confident i can get other girls on dates and have fun interactions so id like to think im safe from insecurities. wasn't always the case though

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What Girls Said 2

  • Well it sounds like your date went well! :)

    Hmm tricky. You don't HAVE to let someone know, though I think from their side, most people PREFER to know.. I think it's okay to bring it up in the moment, like if you guys are about to do the dirty you say, "haha believe it or not this is actually my first time..". The reason why I say you dont have to tell someone is because the first time with a new partner is always kinda awkward and fumbly anyways because you're still getting used to each other.

    • Yeah it did thanks :) I guess she likes me huh? I dunno why dates freak people out, I've always felt pretty comfortable with them. Well i wasn't thinking as far ahead as sex yet, just in terms of pashing with her. My concern is that if she finds out it was my first kiss, given my age she'll be like wtf? I don't want to make a big issue out of it, it is what it is. I've accepted it, it just has bothered some girls I've chatted with in the past

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    • Well i assume by then we would have made out quite a bit so im thinking its unlikely at that point she'd change her mind about sleeping with me.

    • That sounds like a safe assumption lol, I agree

  • Yeap just go with the flow and see what happens

    • You don't think she'll notice if im a bad kisser?

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    • Yeah thats okay until you find the one who truly matters

    • Things take time 👍

What Guys Said 0

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