This inexperienced guy ignored me when I was chasing after him, and then suddenly he is so into me.. Why?

I was CRAZY for a dude I had seen around my school in high school. He was the "outsider" and was different. He never was with girls and on Facebook he doesn't have any female stuff.. So I don't think he gets women. He's introverted and a loner like me. I'm in college now... Maybe 3/4 months ago I started chatting him up. He messaged me back like once a week or whenever and he didn't act interested. I met up with him once by showing up at his work, he suggested hanging out after. We hung out 3 times over the course of like 3 months. I kept asking to hang out with him, maybe every weekend or so, and messaged him first all the time. He also smokes pot daily. He Didn't work but made music. But he never made a move and it all happened unbelievably slow. Everyone told me he just wasn't interested. We made out eventually and nothing more, but that happened like 3/4 months after me trying so hard and it was like the 3rd time he agreed to see me. And then I lost interest when he went out of town for a month. Since he has been back, we had plans and he stood me up, he said he forgot and his friend had came over. I was done at that point. Since then he has been asking me out and blowing up my phone, and I'm no longer receptive.. He then got frustrated and told me I was the one who came after him and it was all me, so I'm obviously interested so why am I not wanting to hang out. He kept saying "you were the one who came on to me" as if I would forever like him til the ends of time because I did so.

i don't get it. He wasn't seeing anyone when I was initially into him. He smoked pot and made music. Hanging out with me 3 times over the course of 3 months is hardly anything, especially when he hardly messaged me. did he view it as more since he doesn't get much action or what? I get he's inexperienced and shy with girls... But this is so weird to me.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He's probably just a melo guy. Like you said he makes music and smokes pot. Usually these guys are into their own things and go with the flow of life. You weren't a part of that flow most likely.

    This sounds weird but I know guys like this, they do their own thing and are happy with it

    • But I was asking him out weekly and he just was always busy or something.. I was trying to be part of his flow and then when I fell out completely then he came all over me... If he's happy with how he is, why is he back and trying?

    • I'm not sure, humans are just complicated and when I think about things too much my head hurts.

      There's always one person in any relationship that just doesn't know how to act and take the other for granted.

What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • He's the kind of guy who likes to lead... old fashioned kind of guy. You felt rejected but in fact, you needed to be doing nothing (as you are NOW) and he's now after you more. Let a guy LEAD...

  • Tell him that you have moved on and you're not interested anymore. He thought you would be eternally interested in him. What an idiot.