Delicate situation. Been dating a guy I met online for about 3 months. Haven't seen him much lately due to him having serious family problems (health issues etc). Saw him last weekend after 2 weeks apart, and had a great time.
Some context with my guy; he's very family orientated and looks after them; his mom is slowly on the mend. Anyway, I suggested if he was free (this weekend) he can stay over at mine on Sunday night. He said "maybe, but would have to see how his mom was doing first." I told him that was fine. We've been in touch all week, but there's been no confirmation about what his plans are. He's a decent guy, and has usually followed up before with confirmation of plans.
He knows I'm away seeing an old friend (not seen her in months) on Saturday night, and there's an option for me to stay at hers on Sunday night. I know I need to tread carefully; I don't want to push him. I'm all for committing Sunday night with him, I just need to know what's going on.
How do I handle this?
Most Helpful Guy
Personally I feel you should just be upfront and be straight with him and let him know the situation and just say you're not attempting to push or rush him in anyway and you want to be supportive of what he's going through right now, but you would just like to confirm what the plans are for this Sunday, because you have the opportunity to spend time with your old friend, but let him know as well you're there for him as a priority first and you just want to make sure he knows this and you'd like to help as much as you can. Just present it just like that and be honest.
Do it casually and I'm sure he'll not see it as you being too pushy at all. He might actually appreciate you making the effort while's he's dealing with the family issues. He may feel like he's no longer along shouldering all of it himself and it might bring the two of you closer together. Even if he doesn't accept your offer, he may see it still in such positive light because he'll know that if he really wanted it, you'd be there for him. That's what I'd do in your situation.1
Most Helpful Girl
... His mom is slowly on the mend...
Being you have been Informed by 'My Guy,' about his Sticky 'Serious Family Problems, and with His own 'Mom who is 'Slowly on the Mend' here, dear, it appears from where I am Sitting... He is merely Being polite by Actually just Saying, "I don't Believe so, Babe. I need to be here for Mom, she may get worse if I leave her right now."
Go ahead and Reschedule with your man. Your Friend to the End has More set Plans in Mind and I am sure, as Wise as I am, it won't Hurt his 'Family Oriented' Feelings with you for being Honest.
Enjoy, hun, and I don't see you in any Hot water. He is already Secure in this Relationship with you, where While he is Home with the Gang, he Knows he Can always Count on "His Girl" to be There for Him for Life Support.
Good luck and Blessings to your Guy's family. xx