Are flaky girls worth the chase?

There's this girl who I don't know how she feels about me. A few months ago, I asked her on a couple "dates" and she went out with me and after that she asked me to hang out with her for a few hours one time and I did and that was the last time I saw her because after that, when I tried to set things up with her, she wouldn't give me a straight answer... she'd disappear for a day or two then call/text me and ask me when I wanted to hang out and then she'd give an excuse. Normally I'd have written her off right away, but I was confused because SHE was the one who contacted ME after a couple days to bring the subject up. Oh and before she gave excuses, she canceled on me the day before we were supposed to see a movie because she was at her cousin's house.

Anyway, after that, I stopped contact with her for a few months, partly to see if she was truly interested since I figured she'd contact me. She didn't contact me. Only recently I texted her to see what's up and it was like old times; we continued our inside jokes, etc. And she was out of the country for a month in the three months of no contact.

I was going to ask her to coffee or lunch but then I realized that I didn't want to put myself in a position of rejection so I just stopped replying mid conversation and have left it hanging ever since, a week later. I don't know if she was truly interested in reconnecting or just being nice, but in any case it's probably too late now.

So is it worth it to keep thinking about this girl? It always feels like I MIGHT be just there, JUST in my grasp. Then again, her actions have been mixed, being flakey near the end of the "relationship" and no contacting me for months. Is it worth it to just forget about her and try to find a girl who definitely WANTS to be with me? But then what if this girl thinks this is just part of the game and is having fun and expects me to play along, too?

But I know I'm being dumb. She's not interested and I keep giving myself false hope. Someone please just tell me she isn't worth it and give me a good reason so I can stop deluding myself.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think she is worth it... if you do end up being with her, what's to say she isn't going to toy with your emotions again, on a possibly larger scale?

    If you didn't want to set yourself up for rejection from her when you weren't even with her, you'll probably end up just being insecure in a proper relationship.

    Well that's my 2 cents anyway.

    • I should have said "rejected again by the same girl". I mean, when she toyed around with me, that's basically what we did. I mean, who wants to be rejected again by the same girl?

    • Re-read my comment... I said "rejection from her". I understood what you meant in your question as that. I just meant that in a relationship with her, you would probably end up feeling insecure.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think this girl is interested in you.. if she really wanted to see you, she would hang out with you regularly. I think she may have been being nice but doesn't really want to hang out. move on. if a girl isn't interested don't keep trying.


What Guys Said 1

  • In my opinion no, find a girl who wants to spend time with you

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