How do I stop being a bitch?

I'm going crazy, I used to be a pretty laid back, chill chick and then I noticed myself becoming increasingly grumpy over the years and now it's like full force! Mornings are number one. I'm pissy as hell in the morning, I wasn't before, it's not entirely noticeable until someone speaks to me, like my boyfriend occasionally wakes me up some mornings before he goes to work to borrow my money (especially today, my last $20 after I had spent $80 the day before for us and his smokes) anyway. I don't know if it's the idea of being awoken for every drop of money I have or if I'm actually just a bitch. I told him to take it then he said I love you, I said it back but he gave me a confused look so I said it again and so did he and I sprung up as fast as I could "can you fucking here me? What's with these fucking looks" or one day I was trying to fix my makeup quickly before we went into Walmart and I was getting mad and being a sweet guy he says "you need to relax, don't worry, you look fine, relax, don't worry" and then I lost it I was like "SHHH!" Mind you, a lot of time when someone repeats themselves over two times I get pretty irritated. Another time I came out grouchy for whatever reason and had a smoke, then left and he asked "what are you doing?" just as he said that I tripped over his feet for like the 100th time and I replied bitchy "tripping over your fucking feet" and shut the door. Little things like that, quite often! I dont know if its him, I don't know if we're under a lot of stress trying to find a place, having a baby, living off of $300 a month which goes to his smokes ASAP. Am I bitch? Am I fed up with him? Does that stuff sound bitchy? I don't know what's going on with me but I'm so sick and tired of feeling like I'm a total asshole. Someone help! How do I control my anger? It's usually only directed at him and I feel I'm coming off as a bitch to his family. He's a really good guy and means no harm most of the time.


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  • I use to be the same way. Something internal you aren't happy with yourself in some way. Figure fhat out and fix it but it takes time. You'll lose dome friends along the way but the ones that matter will remain

    • That's true, I do notice I'm pretty unhappy with my life at the moment and I think a lot of people would be and the friend thing you mentioned I think is bothering me as well cause since I've moved and had my daughter I literally have no girlfriends anymore and I used to love being busy all day from one place to another hanging put with everyone. Now there far away or not around and I have no one to relax, talk to, hang out with. Yeah maybe it's my life making me a miserable bit cheaper, not him. I don't know. Thanks though!!

    • I think after you have a child the depression lasts a lot longer than they say. The same thing happened to me. You go from being free and doing whatever you want to your life being solely confined to the happiness of your child and maintaining life in general that you forget about your own happiness. It's just figuring out what makes you happy and then balancing.