So, my boyfriend of two years left me a little while ago.
Throughout this relationship I never cheated or even considered it, but I always felt that there was a little spark between me and his friend. So it really excited me when this friend asked if I was okay and did I want to hang out sometime.
We did meet up, and since we've both said that we do like each other in that way, and that we'll see how it goes. He has also described us as "Friends with intentions", and has spoken a little bit about past relationships, and even sex.
The only problem is that he's so shy. I feel like sometimes I make him uncomfortable because I come across so bubbly and confident, although of course I'm worried about what to expect with a whole new, completely different guy. He hasn't had any kind of sexual relationship for around 9 months.
I gave him a kiss on the cheek when he dropped me home this evening, and he looked really unsure and slightly embarrassed, as though he didn't really know what to do with himself. I don't want to push him too hard so that he gets uncomfortable and leaves, but I also don't want to act like I'm not interested.
How can I get him to come out of his shell and realise that I'm really into him without scaring him off?
Most Helpful Guy
Damn, this has been one of the cutest things I have read on here in a while. That guy reminds me of me, to an extent. I really like the "friends with intentions" thing, awesomely said.
Anyway, I will try to explain what he feels like and what he is thinking. This guy likes you; and I mean he REALLY likes you. He is afraid to show this, because he does not want to scare you away. His greatest fear right now is that he will do something stupid, silly or awkward which will send you running for the hills.
Whether that fear makes sense or not (it likely doesn't) is not important; he has to deal with it.
Now, onto how you can help him with it. First and foremost, whenever he seems gets insecure, like when you kissed him, just look at him with a nice smile. The kind of smile which says: I like you; all is okay.
Next, when you guys are hanging out, sit closely to him. If it is sometime at night, rest your head on his shoulder while you are talking or watching a movie. That stuff feels AMAZING as a guy; its like the girl is saying: "I trust you and feel safe with you".
Finally, there is the direct approach. If you have been hanging out with him for some time and he suddenly starts getting insecure again, gently confront him about it. Don't go yelling: "OMG ARE YOU NERVOUS?" but rather: "you seem a little nervous, but you really don't have to be! :3"
If you have any more questions, feel free to ask me!2
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