(Casual dating advice needed) Should I move on or stay to see what happens?

So I started dating one girl in my department. She is two years older than I am. She claims she likes me but does not want anything serious since I am younger than her. She wants her boyfriends to be older and more experienced in life than she is. Hence, we are causally dating and I am fine with it.
The problem is that she never initiates things. I ALWAYS call her, text her, invite her to hang out/ date. She will never send me a text first let alone kiss me. It is almost as if she is not interested in me. It makes me feel unwanted/ insecure. The only time she texted me first was when I did not contact her for four days. At some point I called her out on that and then she started initiating things more but recently stopped again. I have a feeling she lost interest in me because I may have appeared boring to her.
I try not to crowd her and text her every couple of days just to see how she is doing. Sometimes it takes three hours to reply with one or two lines. It bothers me. When we go out on a date, everything is great, we have fun, kiss etc.. after it is over, it again goes back to shitty contact and less attention. A lot of guys are after her and she seems to enjoy their company more than mine. I told her it bothers me. We agreed to tell each other if started to date anyone else. I asked her once if she is dating anyone else, she told me no. She knows I feel annoyed that a lot of guys are around her and she texts with them but reassured me that the the right to date her, kiss her and touch her is exclusive to me.
Right now I am not contacting her just to see if she reaches out. If not, I will just move one without telling her and make her find out herself that I am dating someone else.
Either I am expecting too much from casual dating or she is indeed cold towards me.
What do you think I should do? Should I just talk it out? Move on? Am I overthinking it?


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What Girls Said 2

  • Well, this is kinda what casual dating means. It means that you guys don't really do all that much. You seem to want a more intimate relationship while she's literally keeping it all on the brink of casual. I agree that it's not right that she hardly initiates anything, and it certainly is a sign of disinterest, but it could just be that she's a bad texter. Some people are and it really sucks. However, I don't think that that's the case here. I think that she's really only trying to keep the relationship casual because she honestly isn't interested in much more from you... Which really sucks... But it seems like that's how it is. I really like your plan and I honestly would've suggested that you do literally exactly that. I mean, it's really just a test for her. If she really cares about you and wants to keep dating then she'd try to keep you and try more. If not, then she'd just let you go and never contact you or even really notice that you're gone 😕

  • Break up with her. I think she has other guys pursuing her and she is stringing you along as a side option.


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