Should I let it go or keep playing with fire?😋😋🤔🤔?

OK, so I knew this guy my entire life from the moment he was in his moms belly till now. OK I know that sounds weird, but I was a baby his my mom and my mom knew each other for years. So anyway at the age of 15 we both started fooling around for then at 17 we had sex for the first time๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜it was great until I noticed I was great behind the scenes, but not in public ๐Ÿค”. So I got pushed to the side for another woman and I moved to a different county and he had a baby 9 years later I had 4 kids and I'm now a widow๐Ÿ˜”. We meet up again he's the first person again that I slept with in years and now he has this girl he's living with who he claims it's nothing serious. Yea right. So the love I or we had for so many years obviously still exist, but for some strange reason I'm only good enough for closed doors. So I keep seeing him which is only once every 3 months and then he doesn't answer my text for days. So I decided to tell him to just leave me alone and live his life. Do you know he actually got mad at me and stopped talking to me... Lol. Could a real man explain these mind games please. If I submit he's fine if I want to leave he doesn't want to talk to me I'm confused. It's like he's punishing me for leaving him all those years or something. Does any of this make sense? Please give me all your feed back. Thanks in advance.
Should I let it go or keep playing with fire?😋😋🤔🤔?
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