Advice on dating?

What is the best advice you could give a guy my age who seems to have bad luck when it comes to dating. I don't really know how to play the dating game, I'm not good with watching my words so I guess I leave the door open for wrongful speculation from time to time. I also get depressed if I am not interested in some one and she is into me, the thought of rejecting some one makes me feel bad and it is really hard for me to do. I am getting better with that though because I tell myself she will find what she needs and it's just not me. I have tried to be polite in those situations but it always ends up with me being the asshole. I had a gap where i didn't date for like 8 years because I didn't want to be rejected. I feel like i have absolutely no game. I don't know how to talk to girls, how to keep a conversation interesting, how to flirt. It's like I'm just me and I'm not good at selling myself even though I know I'm a good guy I can't help but be humble in a way. The only girls who ever really take time to get to know me are ones I don't feel interested in at all and they always fall hard for me but I just can't seem to find anyone I'm attracted to. I'm really shy and find it hard to approach woman I'm really attracted to I feel like they will never give me the time of day and like I would never be able to give them what they would want. I work crazy hrs and I do a crazy job I'm on nights so that makes it hard too. I don't make very much money and I don't have a lot to offer on that level so I feel like that kinda holds me back even though I know not all woman care about it. My living situation is a little odd right now, I'm moving in with my dad next year so I can save for a home though, so I don't know how that will look. I am a dominant personality, I feel like I'm overly dominant or something is that even possible? What should I do, should I just be heartless and stop being a wuss and go for the ones I find attractive?


What Girls Said 1

  • You say you have a dominant personality, but you certainly don't sound it... and your post seriously repels me (I am speaking honestly as a female).

    Let's just put all labels aside for a moment—all ratings, all superficial thoughts and prejudices—and let me ask: what do you want? Do you want a partner? Do you want to prove to yourself that you can get a girl? Do you want to see how attractive YOU are based on her looks?

    • Ironically I kinda had this exact conversation with my new boyfriend yesterday (he's insecure, comes off as an asshole, but is super sweet and really lonely)... We started out as friends with benefits, and were having sex, and he asked if I was happy with my breast size. I got so fucking pissed at him that I got dressed. He got very emotional, and we talked about it. He said he never felt good enough for extremely hot girls, and went for lesser ones (he rated me fairly average). So, it burned... but he rated himself even lower. What was happening was, his desire to be with a partner was being interrupted by his desire to have self-worth (based on how hot his girlfriend was). The only reason I let it go is because... I do it too.

      This is what it sounds like you're stuck in right now :/

    • Show All
    • I apologize... but you do realize you're on the internet, right?

    • Yeah why am I supposed to be worried about what people think about me or something?

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