Thank you for sharing :) does his family like you, though?
I know his sisters and their husbands do. I'm never quite sure what his mom and dad think lol
How different would you treat the person between considering them family as oppose to not being considered as family?
@hlab3It depends on who they are. What they are about. How were they raised, etc. If I sensed something is not correct about that person. I will speak directly to the one he/she is dating. I will still treat them civilly. But 9/10x I won't be around them as much. Sometimes its not them. Its just me being very introverted and I need my space. I have family members who married people I've never met before. And already they show a lot of problems that makes you question: what the hell were they thinking? But they already had children out of wedlock, so that was an indicator.
How different would you treat her when you consider her family versus her not being considered family?
I would treat my boyfriend the same honestly but I guess I would invite him out with my family more often. Sometimes we could just hang out and talk with my family. Invite him to Thanksgiving, New Years, Christmas, etc
If you feel or knew your partner would be around for a long time, would you feel compelled to consider them family?
Yeah I just think as long as I don't foresee a reason we wouldn't still be together I'd consider her like family
And how different would you treat her if you considered her family?
But if it's you and her against the world as you say, doesn't she then become our family?
How could we be family? We won't make a family. She'll be my romantic partner and best friend, but not family.
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How different would you treat the person between considering them family and not considering them as family?
@hlab3 I tell them everything, every little detail.The way I see it I have 2 different families, my biological family and my chosen family. I get along with both but I dare wouldn't tell half the stuff I tell to my chosen family to my biological one. I'm closer to them, they know more about me but my biological family has been there since I was concieved and been through so much with.
I don't understand when you say "chosen" family. I would of taken it as that you pick that family over your biological one.
@hlab3 I don't pick any family over either one.'chosen' family are my closest friends.
Ah, okay I understand now
How does your family treat him?
They treat him as if he has always been there.
Such as what?
Any reason for this?
Nope, I am just a really hard person to get close to i guess. We had our 1st when I was still living at home and so was he. I livedat home with my mom unmarried until he was 18months and still thought of my parents and sister and brother as being my family first and formost. We got married and got the apartment for 2 years then brought the house and had baby #2 and he just made everything feel different, complete brought everything together for me.
My husband and I have been together for over 13 years now, married for 9.
it won't make difference if I love her than I love her no matter what... even my family accept her or not there wil be no ups and downs it makes in my love life
How different would you treat them when you consider them family?
So if it was said early on in the relationship, you consider them part of the family then? Would your family treat them differently because they are new?
If i don't already think of them as family, it won't be said. And i won't change my behavior like a switch that i turn on or off, it will happen gradually over time. So for me, i'd never say those words early in a relationship because there is so much more to it than attraction and exclusivity.
How different would you treat him when you do consider him family as oppose to not family?
I wouldn't consciously treat him differently. Me treating him differently over time would be natural, and would go along with becoming family. It just happens naturally, it isn't a plan or something I'd think about, one day he'll just be more.
Oh, geez... :/
I'd be more attached and confident that they weren't going anywhere. They'd come to all the family events if they wanted. My parents would treat him like a son.
They would be around my family more often if they were "family" and probably go to more family related events like weddings, holiday gatherings, and maybe even family vacations.Most of the time, just a "boyfriend" wouldn't come to those, they'd do that stuff with their own family separately.
Are you saying he wouldn't come to those because you're assuming he wouldn't or you're just not inviting him? What if he wanted to go to them and be a part of the family?
On how long and how close the couple are
How about anything before that?
Would your family treat your partner as a family member or differently?
They treated here like a family member