Should I talk about it to not be angry anymore or leave it alone?

I did a shitty thing against my boyfriend... I read his Facebook messages. I know it's wrong, and it's an invasion of privacy. I get that. I did it, because I feel like my boyfriend holds a lot back from me and he says a lot more with his friends than he wouldn't tell me.

What I found was a convo between his friend how he was out for dinner and he saw this waitress who is a "fine ass honey" and he was sad that she didn't serve him. And he even had a sad face next to it. I bothered me, because he lied to me about how he doesn't check out women. I wouldn't care if he told me he does, but it's the fact for me that he lies about it. I know it's weird and trivial to me upset about, and I think maybe part of it is that he found someone attractive. When I brought it up to him and what I read, he kept dodging the question and only saying that I aggravate him and all he wanted to do was watch a video with me. He wouldn't outright deny or confirm even though it's in his messages.

I get it: he's human. I'm upset at the fact that he cannot be honest with me. I have a hard time getting over being mad and the last thing I wanna do is piss him off even more. I don't know, am I being weird and stupid?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You did something wrong, he lied and now you know all this but rather let it bother you. Guy will check girls out. That's a given. No reason to lie about it. But I wouldn't let affect me either. You started something could be avoided. Now you found out your attempting to make bigger than what it's not. Guys when see a nice peice of ass we don't look away. When we see a girls boobs hanging of her shirt we don't look away. It's attractive to us. It's a light skinned guy with sea blue eyes and a 6 pac jogging down the street with his shirt off. Tell me you won't glance at him. Ladies some times can't help when there guy ain't around either. So. Let it go.

    • Okay. :/ all I did was apologize for reading his text and invading his privacy. That's all I have said to him so far, but he hasn't said anything back.

    • Well, have a cookie while you wait. 🍪. Then, if he don't respond give him time to. Less than a day. If none then. Let him collect himself. He'll come bk to you eventually.

    • Thank you :)

What Guys Said 1

  • It's like the classic question, "does this dress make my ass look fat?" The only good answer is not to answer.

    by the way, are you still beating your mother?

    • Wait, what? I don't beat my mom; that's terrible.

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    • You shouldn't have invaded his privacy, but you apologized. it's up to him now to accept that. Privacy is a casualty of intimacy. Just give him time and forget about it otherwise.

    • Thank you, dear. :)

What Girls Said 1

  • He doesn't want to offend you by saying another woman is attractive, but doesn't want to lie to you either. Don't you notice other attractive men? I understand that it's very easy to get jealous, but just remember that he chose you. If you start getting too jealous it may be a deal breaker for him.

    • I notice other men being attractive, but I don't talk about it to my friends. I keep them to myself, and move on with my life. And it's not even about just finding other people attractive, it feels like he holds a lot back from me. As bullshit as it sounds, that's how I feel sometimes.

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    • Okay, thank you. :)

    • I hope you guys become stronger from this little scuffle!