Should I ask this girl out?

She is 30 years old, I am 24. She works at the gym I am going. When I went there yesterday, she asked me the typical "How are you" and I told her that "I've been better". She asked me why and we talked for about half and hour for multiple topics. She told me that I am mature, I complimented her, mentioning that her parents did a good job with her. I ask her if she works in the morning shift and what's her favorite coffee beverage. I was thinking of getting to the gym with a cup of coffee tomorrow, asking her if we could possibly meet in weekend. I could also take the pressure off, by giving her my phone and let her call me. What do you think?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Too soon to call it.

    Give it some time just chatting to her. Try n sus out the vibe. Is she just doing her job and being nice? Try and find out if she is even single.

    Wait before you make a mistake!!

    • Why asking a girl out is a mistake?

    • You've only just met. You met her at her workplace. She is much older. You don't know if she is single.

      Things take time.

    • I agree with HitGirl_4680. Last month I started talking to a girl that works at my gym. I just talked to her because its their job to be nice. I asked her out for coffee and didn't happen, i kept talking to her to be friendly and later she gave me her number (I didn't ask for it, that time.) She didn't really text me back so I stop. Found out she is in a relationship, but the whole time never mention him.

      Talk with her more. That is a cool idea.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You know, it's kind of a tough call. If this were a normal situation, I wouldn't like the passive nature of giving her your number but in your case, I think that that's the way to go. While it's not exactly the same, shortly after college, I knew a lot of women who worked waitress jobs. They would talk about how you should never ask out a girl who's working because they always hated getting asked out. The problem that they'd talk about is that there's a conflict of interest. They're trying to be friendly and flirtatious to get a good tip, but at the same time, they don't want to lead a guy on or upset him by rejecting him outright. Their take was that they just wished that guys could enjoy the flirting but always leave it at that.

    So yeah, it's not quite the same but I like the plan of either doing nothing until you're more certain, or just slipping her your number. But even slipping her number could be awkward if she sees you every day so just be ready to drop it altogether if she never calls.

    • I was thinking of a note like "We could get another cup of coffee like this at the weekend" alongside with the coffee. However, I want to cover my tracks, without leaving evidence. Do you think that it was a compliment or a chit chat during work time?

    • That's the thing, you can't really tell. Because while at work, it's her job to be nice to the customers so there's that similar issue in play with the conflict of interest. However, it's a gym, not a restaurant and she's not working for tips so that works in your favor. If it were a waitress, I'd say absolutely not, but this leaves enough possibilities to where you could do something light and it wouldn't be completely ridiculous.

      Anyway, I love the note idea because she doesn't have the pressure of having to say no to your face. I think you've given this enough thought to where you can pull this off without creeping her out. I say go for it. ;-)


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • why not , we do that and it's ok

  • Sounds like a good idea. Very impressive with the coffee.

    • do you think so?

    • Show All
    • Don't write everything down, just your number, and name if she doesn't know it yet.
      Tell her you'd love to take her somewhere on the weekend. If she can't, and you want to make it less awkward, tell her you understand if she doesn't want to because it's from work etc. And that may actually be the truth, because it's work and you're a regular at her work place, she may either not be allowed or not want to in case it doesn't work and she has to keep seeing you when she goes to work. Also, the age difference might be a factor for some.

      Honestly though, the fact you were actually listening and took the effort to remember smaller details like the coffee, I think anybody would be really impressed and feel warm towards that person. So even if she does say no, you know she'll still be touched by it and think very highly of you. Like you told her her parents did a good job with her, she'll think the same of you.

    • Thank you

What Guys Said 1

  • Absolutely. 30 year old single women are desperate for love having hit the wall and their eggs about to go past their best before date after years on the cock riding carousel. You can plow her for a while and then trade her in for someone younger and hotter when your ready to settle down for marriage and kids.

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