The whole thing is a filtering system. If you're dating someone, whether for a month or a year; if you feel truly comfortable and the girl mirrors just as much as interest.. who cares who plans what? You hear from every article on the internet that when the girl plans dates and initiates "that it would kill a guy's interest!" Only the losers would become complacent, sit back, and let the girl take the lead. It doesn't work like that.
It's all about achieving balance.
Girls, don't initiate dates to reassure yourself that he's still interested in you. Plan a date because you want to and you want to spend time with the guy. I believe it's perfectly acceptable to plan a date after a guy has done so... hence, dating is a two-way street. Of course, always make sure he is investing just as much as you.
In the beginning, I feel guys should pursue the girl for a few dates and if things go well, and you're completely comfortable with each other, you should take turns. I'll probably receive comments saying "why should the guy do all the work at the start blah blah" but to be honest, I wouldn't want to be with a guy with that attitude. I like to know they're interested. Yes, dating/courtship has changed a LOT over the decades but it's core rituals are still the same: women DO like being pursued at the beginning and men like the chase. When that "chase" is over, is where things really begin chnage - either better or for worse.
- Yes! The guy should mostly initiate until you're exclusive.Vote A
- No!Vote B
Most Helpful Guy
In the beginning, I feel girls should pursue the guys for a few dates and if things go well, and you're completely comfortable with each other, you should take turns. I'll probably receive comments saying "why should the girl do all the work at the start blah blah" but to be honest, I wouldn't want to be with a girl with that attitude. I like to know they're interested.
See? It works the other way around, too. You have not named one logical reason as to why girls should be the ones being chased.
All of my dates have been initiated by women, I never had to "chase" a girl. I'm used to that and now matter how many questions like these come up, that's not gonna change. Sorry, not sorry.4