Is it okay to be quiet on a first date?

I never know what to say. and I don't mean I don't know what to say to my date. I don't ever know what to say to people I'm not good friends with. when I try, I stumble over my words because there's just not a whole lot up there besides music. all I know is I like the girl on the other side of the table. but if I don't say anything, she's going to think I'm uninterested in her. I've been single for a while because I focus all my energy on making music or w/e and that has replaced everything I used to know. I must seem like a dumb fuck tbh haha. what do I do?


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What Girls Said 2

  • No, just talk about anything you would feel comfortable talking about or something you have knowledge of, just no politics! If you stay quiet it will be interpreted as no connection whatsoever and most likely there will be no second date. Talk about anything, water, the park, dogs, cats, the drinks, the food, a movie, just never stay quiet.

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    • I appreciate your insight. Sounds like I'm fucked if I don't take some time to learn to talk more. Wish me luck

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    • I wanted to give you an update. last night I was thinking about what you said about how if I stay quiet it will be interpreted as no connection. and then it hit me: the reason I've been quiet on dates recently is because there IS no connection whatsoever. I've been looking for the wrong person for the past couple years. it makes more sense now. so I just wanted to let you know you led me to an epiphany about myself. thank you!!

    • So glad to have helped in some way 😊

  • If you don't talk on your first dates the girl is going to loose interest faster than you can think, try to come up with something, talk about your music, talk about what you like to do in the future with your music, since it's your passion, ask them what they think about music and what they listen to and bllablla and the conversation starts and it never ends ;) just like music :) take care and good luck

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    • won't that be worse if I talk too much about myself?

    • talk about your self and ask her at the same time what she thinks about ti and if she likes it and if she is involved in those things that you do, and if not in what is she involved and what is her passion and compare your passion to hers if it's different, the list goes on and on, you should practice in front of a mirror, trust me it helps, you might think you look like a creep but it will just help you, talk to yourself and you will see ;)

    • I'll give it a shot. thank you!

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