Why men disappear?

This isn't based in a specific incident but I would like some reasons men "phase out" when everything is seemingly going well in the dating phase. I've seen this happen a few times, particularly with online dating. Any thoughts?

Updates:
I appreciate everyone's input. This is an interesting subject and I'm seeing an array or answers, a complete difference between women and men's opinions. Thanks all.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Chances are, the "going well" is in the woman's head. ie, going well for her but not necessarily him. Or you simply weren't his type or what he was looking for etc. All the same reasons a woman 'disappears"

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What Guys Said 12

  • Guys typically make the initial effort which I think women may think means the guy likes them. We just have to do that pretty much in order of figure out if we like a girl. A lot of times guys realize they aren't interested and likely have a list of girls they're pursuing.

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  • Look at the difference between male and female replies to this question. Can you see it?

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    • Nailed it. Women can't see how their behavior and how they treat men turns them off. Most men want a mutual relationship.

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    • Perhaps ( and this is a generalized statement) it lies in the fact men and women tend to communicate differently

    • True as that may be, it begs to question; If we learn communication from our parents or whoever is around us as we grow up, are we just repeating the form of communication they themselves have developed? Just food for thought.

  • Usually because the guy is tired of initiating all the time.

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  • They get to know you better and find you unsuitable

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  • men are tired of happen to put up with women for the way they treat us

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  • going well for who, you or him?
    there could be any number of reasons.

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    • When I'm implying going well I mean frequent contact via phone and in person between both parties.

  • Everything is going great from your perspective, not his. If it was mutual, he wouldn't "disappear".

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    • This isn't based on one incident. I've seen it many times and while that seems like the obvious answer I think it's rarely that simple.

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    • I'm asking generally why this happens. It seems to be pretty prevalent theses days (ie ghosting)

    • It is. Especially because of texting and social media and being able to block people if you want to avoid them lol. But in general it happens because he found something he didn't like about you.

  • Women do the same thing. There not serious is a relationship, to begin with.

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  • ur dating magicians

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  • they get scared or nervous

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  • Maybe something really important came up. Like when Skyrim or Fallout 4 came out. :P

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  • I suspect the key here is the word "seemingly".

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    • I think the problem must lie in the lack of ability to communicate. I've seen time and again where people will chat back and forth and go out etc then just stop contact. I think it's odd, in your experience why does this happen?

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    • You have to hear then listen. That is computing. Know the behavior

    • @Smarter thank you for that explanation.

What Girls Said 4

  • -Found someone else
    -Wasn't that interested
    - Got scared of commitment/relationship
    -Still wants to see if there are other options
    -Wants to be single and free
    - Didn't get what he was expecting/wanting (sex)
    -His wife or girlfriend out about you

    Thats all i can think of really

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  • It's probably not going as well as you think. I guess they're "ghosting" on you because they're uninterested.

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    • I guess I'm confused about at what point people lost the ability to have a conversation about something instead of avoiding the situation like a coward.

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    • I might do it after one or two dates, but if it went further than that there is no way I would just disappear like that.

    • @zagor I agree. After a date or two I don't think you owe most an explanation

  • it means things weren't going well for him

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  • Maybe they don't want to commitment, or be tied down to a relationship.

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