He became distant. Is he just in his "man cave" or is he gone forever?

I dated this guy and we had such a great connection that it felt like meeting a true soulmate. We had so many things in common and then we had sex this Saturday. It was great, even after he was so cuddly and caring and he stayed with me also on Sundy. Later, he started distancing himself - his texts were really cold, short. On Tuesday he asked me if he can come over and cook for me (Iast time when we talked I was joking that I would like him to cook for me). He was very gentle to me and caring, but he didn´t initiate sex. Later, he told me that the real reason why he came over was to talk - he asked me for time. He said that he just broke up with one girl who is now constantly texting him and he is stressed at work and that he got overwhelmed on our last date, so he wanted to sleep with me, but now he questions timing.

I was doing my best to be cool and I told him that he can have his time and that I´m not chasing him. I asked if he feels any pressure from my side and he said that not at all and that he enjoys his time with me. He just needs few weeks to be single so he can focus on his work and get his life in order. However he stated that he wants to continue to see me, but just take it slow. He even promised that he will help me with some stuff in my house this weekend.

However, I haven´t received any text today and I´m really worried if he´s just fading away slowly or he is really sincere in needing more time?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Back away and let him come back to you on his terms, or push forward and chase him away forever.

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    • Thanks for your answer. This is what I understood and therefore I assured him that he can have his space. But I´m really worried and I don´t know what is going on. He is a sweet guy and I wonder whether this is not a way to say good bye in a kind way. Only action I´ve made was that I sent him a text where I wrote "Thanks for a delicious dinner, take care" and he responded "it was my pleasure".

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    • The thing was that he texted me before I had chance to do it - he sent me a text saying just "Hi, I left you a muffin on your desk" and I responded "Thank you, that was very kind of you" and he responded "You are very welcome". I´ve never made any accusation and I was calm all the time. Only negative statement I´ve made was when I jokingly said "This is a very bad decission, your loss" and he responded sadly with "yes yes". I´m leaving for holiday on Sunday and I will be travelling 3 weeks. Once I return I will probably contact him and bring him something from holiday and say something like you suggested.. Thank you OlderAndWiser for your words of support and for your advice. Wish you all the best

    • Good luck. Please PM me and let me know how things resolve.

What Girls Said 1

  • Protect yourself and consider him a loss. If you must in a week or so text him with an "I miss your friendship" see what happens. If he's into you he will come back... eventually. If he's not you've already protected your heart, no since wasting your life waiting on a possible maybe...

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