Is there any nice or polite way to friend zone a girl?

I had just broke up with my girlfriend of 8 months. When my close friend Jenny tells me that she loves me and has wanted to try dating me for 2 years. Even while I was dating my last girlfriend she liked me and was hoping that I'd be single again soon.
Right now I'm not really ready for another relationship and I don't really see Jenny as a potential date for me. ! maybe I might want to latter but now I'm still getting over my last girlfriend. I don't want to ask her to wait longer for her maybe having a chance with me. I'd rather keep her as a good friend. Latter if I start to like her I might try asking her out. Right now I'm definitely not ready and I'd rather she try to find another guy and not wait up for me. Is there any good way to put that?
Any one else got any suggestions?


Most Helpful Guy

  • ow man that is hard. Your female freind could not have picked a worse time to tell you either. I suggest that you have a somewhat causal talk with her. Talk to her and tell her how you feel. That you just are not ready and if you were you don't feel the same way about her as she does about you. Your not sure if you will or not.

    It is up to you if you want to tell her not to wait around. If you tell her to go find another guy then you really risk losing her as your freind. Even if it is to spare her feelings. Your a kind person to be thinking of your freind that way. Not many people would even consider her feelings. They would just use her as a friends with benefits. If you don't tell her to move on you do leave your self open and her open for a possible realationship in the future. I know your definitly not ready for one now but maybe latter your view of her might change.

    Contrary to people like shadowlegend don't push your close freind jenny away just because she has feelings for you. It is not unfair to ask her to remain your freind if you tell her that your not interested. You should ask her to try and remain your freind. If she does not well then she sadly stopped being your freind when she got her crush on you. If she ends the friendly relationship than that is her decision. Being a freind when you have a crush on someone is not settling. It is being their freind with has great amount of value in itself. Just because she wants to be more than freinds is no reason to end the freindship.

    Sadly there is no polite way to freindzone her. You can't highly suggest that you two are just freinds. Freinds that have a crush won't see the signs or they will ignore them. The best way is just to talk with her.

    • I was afraid of that. I don't want to lose her as a closely trusted freind. I guess that decision is up to her when I talk with her. How do I have a casual talk and sit down with her? Any suggestions on how to do that. Without giving her the wrong idea?

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    • I normally see her when I take her to college. We both go to the same college an hour away and we car pool. She lives down the street from me.

    • Maybe I'll pull over and chat or I'll just get to college a bit early so we can talk.

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What Girls Said 1

  • It's unfair of you to ask her to remain you friend. The decent thing to do if you know she wants more than friendship is to clearly state you aren't interested, and to prevent her getting the wrong impression and to allow yourself to find closure with your last relationship, you should have some distance between you (and you should). You don't have a friendship if she doesn't want the friendship but will settle for it until you give her more. It has reached it's natural end and you don't want the relationship, so part ways.

    • While I agree that I need to let her know that I'm not interested. I really don't want to just shove her away. I really don't want to lose someone else from my life right now. If she decides that she can't stay my freind that is on her but I'm not shoving her away just cause I don't want to try dating her. Heck I would rather just give her a few pity dates than to be mean and end our friendship like that.

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    • You aren't a friend at all from what I've read, you're awful.

    • Says the girl that says push away a freind with a crush.

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