Need advise on my boyfriends family?

Okay so, my boyfriend and I have been talking since October, and officially started dating in December. Before me, he was in a relationship for a year and half, with a complete psycho. She was abusive, a bitch, and two faced. When we started talking, all she would do is send me rude stuff, stalk my Facebook, Instagram, and was still in contact with his mom. His mom on the other hand, didn't like me because he was out late, and wasn't always home (he's 18). She called me rude stuff, didn't want him with me, and just always complained. Now his brother has a girlfriend and she's trying to be friendly to me, invite me to do things, but I'm not comfortable at all. I'm scared that I won't be living up to their expectations of me, because of his ex. I don't feel welcomed to the family, and I don't think I ever will. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Getting along with each other's family is ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL for the success of a LTR. Make the effort. They may have realized that their initial reaction to you was a bit unfair.

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    • See I've tried. I never once did anything for them not to like me, and when I met his other members of the family, I was respectful and everything. This isn't the first time a guys family has been rude to me.

Most Helpful Girl

  • You can't help what his mother thinks of you, but it wouldn't hurt to try and impress her a little. She's not wrong to be upset that he was out late and not home often, 18 is a legal adult but he's still dependent on her and living under her roof so he should answer to her.
    His brothers girlfriend is trying to make you feel welcome and you're pushing her away why? Have you considered that maybe she feels the same as you and that she wants to have someone in a similar situation to talk to about it? It doesn't sound like you're making much of an effort.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • I think his family is still hurt and "on edge" because of the last girl. This is totally unfair to you because you are a different person and they are not giving you chance. For now you have to play the game. Don't do things that pisses his mom off. If he is out too late, then stop doing that. If he is gone with you all the time, then stop doing that. You need to give them a chance to see you are a different person. Don't avoid them and give them a reason to hate you. This will suck for a bit, but bite your tongue and take it for a while until they get to know you better. Treat them the same you want to be treated and sooner or later they will see you are a good person and hopefully start to change their tune.

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  • It's up to your boyfriend to establish boundaries with his family. If he won't then you have a decision

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  • Always be wary of the boy's mother. They always hate all women interested in their sons. You're never going to be "good enough" for him.
    No way she's changed to suddenly being your best friend.
    Out of respect tp your boyfriend, you have to be polite and civil toward her. But never trust her. She is not, nor will she ever be your friend.

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    • See that's what I learned with my ex. His mom "loved" me at first, then she started hating me, then went back to liking me. I mean I'm a respectful girl, and the only reason I am is because that's his mom, but with her, I don't think she'll ever accept me.

What Girls Said 1

  • I would say go, prove them that you're great for your son, the more you go the more they will see you putting in an effort.

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